Expert: Dr. Dennis W. Neder - 1/22/2007

Question
no serious means not marriage... serious means relationship wise...yeah i think she know i like her.... i think she wants someone who she trusts....but the main problem is I'm not sure if she wants a relationship with anyone... as i said she is that decent type....
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i know her for 3 months now....i do not know if she likes me...she never had a boyfriend till now,i asked her why?? she said she is only interested in serious relationship...do U think i should propose or take my time....???
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ok i got what your saying...... but going for a date is too forward thinking.... first i have to propose her....do U know any interesting topics to talk about....??? i really run out of topic with her....
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hi, I'm 18year old, i like this girl form collage same age...i met her recently i think 3 months back....we talk to each other sometimes when we meet for an hour....she told her friends that I'm cute AND that my hair looks good...but she is very hard to get, she is like very studious girl and decent type...what should i do??? do u think she likes me????
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Hello Desmond!

Yes, I think she likes you. The problem is that you need to move this somewhere or it's going to die for neglect.

Don't try to impose your own vision of her life on her. Everyone is "busy", but we make time for the things that are important to us. You should assume that getting to know you is important and that she has time for it.

Just tell her that you want to get to know her better and give her the date/time. Say something like, "Let's have some coffeee [or whatever]. Clear your Friday night and I'll [pick you up/meet you] then."

Be clear about the date, time and location and don't agree to call her to confirm. Just be clear about things. Then, spend your time talking about her favorite subject - her. Also, since this is a date, but sure to kiss her!

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
818.334.8826
www.beingaman.com
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I
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Hello again Desmond!

Yes, I know the MOST INTERESTING topics to discuss with her: HER!

Don't make the mistake of thinking you have to "entertain" her. You're not a clown or a social director - you're a suitor. She'll be entertained simply because she likes you.

Go to my website and read my FAQ's on communication skills: http://beingaman.com. They'll give you everything you need to know.


Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
818.334.8826
www.beingaman.com
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I
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Hello again Desmond!

As I said in my first message, yes, I think she likes you. Do you honestly think she doesn't know you like her? I'm sure she does.

Going out on a date is no big deal. It's just two people getting together for a few hours to learn about each other. Do you need to "propose"? I'd hope not - you don't even know this girl yet!

If she means "serious" as in "get married" that's pretty scary stuff! What's it based on? Why would she be "serious" about someone she doesn't even know?

Desmond, don't make this a bigger deal that it is. Just invite her to spend some time with you. Until you do that, you're always going to just be some guy she knows - not someone that she thinks is great and worthy of dating and more.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
818.334.8826
www.beingaman.com
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"  

Answer
Hello again Desmond!

Trust me - she wants a relationship. This is pre-wired into her simply by her being a woman. It has nothing to do with being "decent" or not!

The real question is what kind of man she wants that relationship with. As with marriage, I'd sure hope she's not just trying to get into a relationship. Not only is that dangerous, it's insulting! It's like you're just the guy that walked in front of her target - not some guy she actually chose to be with.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
818.334.8826
www.beingaman.com
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"