Expert: Dr. Dennis W. Neder - 3/10/2007

Question
Hello,

My boyfriend and I work together but not in the same department. He told me about a month ago that "we need a break" in order to get his head cleared and his career back on track. Since that is very ambiguous phrase and definitely not the best sign, I assumed he was breaking up with me but didn't close the door on him totally just in case he decided to come back. I wasn't waiting around for him or anything, but he was a really good man and he treated me really well and really took good care of me and loved me very much so I had to take that into consideration...I know that is hard to find nowadays.

So after he said he needed that break I pretty much disappeared from his life and hit the road running. Out of sight, out of mind. I didn't contact him or anything. but I had this feeling he would be back. You know why? He is an extremely strong individual but he told me once "my only weakness is women" LOL. Well my only weakness is men. Dammit! LOL!!!

Anyway so I hadn't seen him for a month. Then I ran into him the other day at Subway and said hi but I didn't linger around to talk to him. So then out of the blue the next day he text messages me asking how i'm doing. Then we started emailing back and forth and he said he would be playing guitar for some of my guy friends, and he wanted me to come see him. I said the only way I was coming is if he was going to serenade me, and he said fair enough, he would start working on that song immediately.

Ok so is he just trying to make things cool between us and be friends since it was awkward for a while. Or does he want me back as a girlfriend?

Answer
Hello Beatrice!

I don't know. You know him far better than I do and I just never learned to read minds!

Asking you to come hear him play and agreeing to "seranade you" doesn't mean very much. Frankly, it all sounds much more like a business deal; "I'll do something for you, if you do something for me."

I'll say this: I'm sure he misses you just as you miss him, but that doesn't mean he misses the relationship. I suggest you go hear him play and see what becomes of things. Be open to possibilities.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
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Remington Publications
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