Expert: Dr. Dennis W. Neder - 10/12/2006

Question
i never asked her about her boy,she mentioned it ,telling me that they were not serious.so what should i do to let her i want to be her boyfriend.?
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Followup To

Question -
i met this girl on internet and fell for her.she first gave me her email ad. and then her number.we communicated for some days but when i asked whether they were still an item with her boy she said yes.then i went further to ask her whether she think we should be togeher but she told me that we should be just friends and see what that will lead to?should i wait for her ,really?

Answer -
Hello Edu!

Absolutely not. Is that all you really want? Just to be her "friend". You know that women don't date their "friends" - EVER - don't you?

You've put all the power into this girl's hands and taken none for yourself. You're the man here, right? You have certain rights and responsibilities, but you're giving her all your power. No wonder she's no longer interested.

She originally was, which is why you had her email address and telephone, but because you didn't just come out and tell her what you wanted her to do, and then, played around with things by asking her questions like this, she decided that you're not the kind of man she's looking for. Thus, she's thrown you a bone instead - to be "friends".

I suggest you move on and find someone else. Then, don't be their "friend" first either! Go get what you want!

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
818.334.8826
www.beingaman.com
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"


Answer
Hello again Edu!

First, you need to go great my FAQ's at my website: http://beingaman.com and click on "Self Help". Read all the information about being "friends" with women. That will give you an idea of what it's going to take to turn this around - if you even can.

In any other situation, the boyfriend would be a non-issue. As I constantly tell guys, it's much more difficult to keep a girlfriend than to steal someone else's. That's not your problem here at all, it's that you've become her friend.

Go read the FAQ's to get an idea of what you need to do.

In fact, I don't suggest you wait for her at all. I suggest you move on and take charge of your next relationship. About all you can do now is to just contact her and tell her that you're going to meet her for a drink. Then, when you do, turn on the charm and hope you can get past her having taken this control away from you in the first place.

Frankly, it's not a very likely thing, but it's all you have now.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
818.334.8826
www.beingaman.com
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"