Expert: Trey McGowan - 11/9/2007

Question
I have  12 year old boy who is autistic at school. I am new to special
education and to autism. I am the special ed teacher. Anyways this boy is a
delight. He continually talks about Scooby Doo. His aide has him now only
talking about this topic on their walks for PE. The one concern we have for
him is his lack of grooming. He always wears shorts, no socks and those croc
shoes - even in cold weather. The aide now has him put socks on for their
walks. This boy will pick at his toys in the classroom and on one on one with
his aide. She has talked to him about this - how it isn't the right time and not
good hygiene. He has also now started to pick at his butt area and scratch his
private parts. It doesn't look like he has had a bath or a shower lately -
maybe once a week. His parents are very busy people - working away from
their home and at differnt hours so home life is busy. His nails often need
clipped and we do it at school. We have set up a grooming routine for him in
the a.m. when he comes to school. He brushes his teeth and combs his hair.
we need him to get cleaner though as he is getting older and his body is
changing. We do have showers at school but.....Do you think we could set up
a grooming schedule for him at home and is that our place (we are the
school). Or...? With him getting older I don't want him to be picking and
scratch out in public or where his Grade 7 classmates will see him and maybe
make fun of him. Plus when your body smells it is not pleasant for any one
around you. Help!

Answer
Hello, Carrie!

To be honest, reading through your question, you have pretty much answered it yourself! AKA, a grooming routine for him would be the #1 *best* thing ever.

I think the best thing that you can do is to speak with his parents about the grooming issues and that you would like to set up the schedule for him to do or help them to do it. It's very likely that his parents have not dealt much with autism and they don't realize what sort of things could help out, and as you are the teacher of special ed, new to the job or not, you have some experience in the area and can help them out. Plus, by making the schedule, it's something that he can keep with him his entire life.

The only reason that I say 'talk to the parents' is that in this way, it is much less likely they will feel threatened by changes that you are suggesting. While many parents are comfortable with getting some assistance, having other people *make* those assists without asking can make issues later on. This way, you can extend the hand of friendship, so to speak, and make them feel even more comfortable with the things you are doing to help their son.

Hopefully that helped some!

Trey