Expert: James Michael Roan - 10/5/2008

Question
QUESTION: Well, the ASQ asks those questions under the heading of "problem solving". So, if it is imitation he lacks, this is something that needs to be addressed right away, isn't it? Kids are supposed to imitate, aren't they? Sometimes if I cock my head to one side, he will smile and do the same think or if my husband makes a silly face, he will imitate it.

I guess I should call the doctor tomorrow instead of waiting for his 15 month check up in November?

ANSWER: Hi Allison;

It sounds like he does imitate then. You are probably doing this as I type (!) but make an inventory of spontaneous imitation, immediate versus delayed imitation, and instructed imitation. Delayed imitation is normal and usually involves motor imitation tasks because it takes about 24 hours for sequences of learned motor actions to pattern in the motor cortex. Some children show delays in imitation, but can be taught them through playing games or watching shows like Barney (Lord help us!). Sit with your son in your lap and when necessary physically cue the correct motor response by guiding arms and hands and then eventually fading your support as he responds appropriately.

If you live in the U.S., call the special education department in your school district and ask to make an Early Intervention referral. They will assess him and provide service if he qualifies for them. It's free.

Regards,
Jim

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Thanks, Jim. You're right- I think I probably am typing as you are typing!

I do live in the U.S., but I can't even believe we are talking about a child of mine and "special education department" in the same sentence. I mean, I didn't expect him to go to Harvard or anything, but I figured he would be as quick to learn as my brother and I were! My brother has an IQ of 145 and both my parents hold Master's Degrees and my Dad is a former CEO! This kid has good genes!

Is it possible that he is concentrating so much on motor skills right now that this particular skill has taken the "back seat", so to speak, and will strengthen in time?

DO many children who show delays in imitation still go on to be "normal", happy, mainstreamed kids?

I never crawled as a child, and I meet people who have concerns that their child doesn't crawl and there are all sorts of studies indicating that children who don't crawl end up having all kinds of disabilities later in life. Obviously, that wasn't the case with me. I keep telling myself this because I am getting pretty worked up over this thing with Donovan (my son). I just wish he would do it- stack those blocks or put those balls back in the bucket!!! It would make me feel SO MUCH better!!!!

Thanks again....
I wonder if he should see he some kind of therapist to help "move" this particular skill along....And not just Barney ha ha ha!!!

ANSWER: Hi Allison;

Please forgive my seemingly insensitivity! I just do this all the time, 7 days a week and all summer long in Ireland.

Please remember, a "developmental delay," if it is found he has one, is just that: a delay, not a disorder. It's rare that a delay becomes a disorder. It becomes a disorder when it continues to exist beyond the age of 9. About 99.9 % of delays go away. It's just as "normal" to have a delay as it is to be advanced at this age. Neither case has any predictive value for future performance. We just prefer to not take any chances and provide therapy just "in case."

-Jim

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Oh, no, you weren't being insensitive! I just never a million years thought MY CHILD would have a delay. (I'm sure you hear this all the time from parents!!!!) I still can't really grasp the concept of it. My perfect, beautiful, boy having a possible developmental delay? It just doesn't seem possible!!!!

Hey, if therapy is going to help him, then by all means, bring it on!

I mean, with all the "talk" of autism in the media, it's hard not to be concerned about these things. There are so many other things that this could be other than that, but as a parent, your mind automatically thinks "autism".

Things were a heck of a lot simpler when my parents raised their kids, that's for sure! Of course, when my parents were children, it was polio that every parent feared....

Answer
Hi;

Yes, we really are hypersensitive to "difference" in children. I did not learn to read until 7 and then my skills escalated out of sight. Luckily, when I was 7, there wasn't the special education machine there is now or I would have been thrown into it!

Regards,
Jim