Expert: Trey McGowan - 2/27/2008

Question
i have a two year old daughter and 7 month old son. i know each child is different and boys are different from girls, but i am still feeling a nagging feeling my 7 month old is different. he flaps hi arms big time. he also does a lot of rocking. he can not stop moving. even when he is having a bottle, he just wiggles around. he makes great eye contact and he knows his name, no eating problem, 21 lbs. everyone feels i am just overly concerned, maybe i am and i just feel that there is no way my life could just have been so perfect to give me all i have, but i still have that "mothers intuition" that something is not right. any suggestions? how can i try to calm is constant need to flap and move?

Answer
Hi there, Julie!

If you are concerned about the situation, the best thing you can do is take him to a specialist who can assess him and give you a much more professional idea of what's going on with your child. I am not a doctor, and even if I was, just hearing about it over writing can't replace a direct assessment. Thus, if you are genuinely concerned, that would be the place to go. However, even as not being a doctor, I can reassure you that at 7 months old, high energy is not an unusual situation with children, and if he is not showing any of the other symptoms or signs of autism (touch aversion, eye contact issues, sensitivity) then I would definitely not be concerned about it, but instead give him time to grow into (or out of!) this stage.

As for how you can calm it, I wonder a few things. For instance, is the movement an agitation? Or is it just energy and exuberance? If it doesn't seem to be a negative thing, then the best way to calm the constant need is to let him do it and wear himself out. The more you try to stop him from it, the more energy he will have built up. Hand flapping, even in autistics, is a harmless way of working off the bursts of energy and can be extremely calming. Likewise with moving; if you give him the chance to move around when he doesn't need to hold still, it should be easier to get him to hold still when he does, because he hasn't got the built-up energy.

Other ways to handle the child's energy are to get him times and objects with which to burn it off. Jolly Jumpers (a Canadian company which I can't recommend highly enough!) are a fantastic way, as are other 'high movement' toys and games where the child can work it all off.

Remember that at 7 months, you have a lot of growing, learning, and maturing to do. Take a breath and relax, and give the child a few more months before you start panicking about these things. It's too early to tell most things for certain yet, so instead of getting into a tizzy, enjoy the precious moments, however over-energetic, while you have them!

Feedback, comments, replies, follow-ups, or whatever can be sent as you like! I'm happy to help wherever I can. Good luck to you!

Trey