Expert: Catherine Ridenour - 5/12/2008

Question
I have a 19 yr old boy who was diagnosed in 3rd Grade but due to him being gifted was not given any services thru the public school. He graduated from a highly structured private prep school with a 94 unweighted ave and a 110 weighted average. He was accepted into a six year doctoral program for pharmacy with an 1/2 scholarship - ranked #16 upon entering a class of 300 - so we know he has the capabilities. Last semester he failed two classes - although the freshmen center was able to get them changed to withdrawals. They were not difficult courses - but he did not turn in all the papers. This has been a problem since grammar school. Now comes the end of the second semester and he has failed at least 1 class - not all the grades are in - after going back and reading his emails I expect 1 more F as the lab teacher mailed him not all the labs were turned in and he should send them in or withdraw, he did nothing - At this point he might be out of the pharmacy program if not the college- I was wondering if you had info on careers and if high functioning students (PDD-NOS) were able to complete college and if you know of any help we could ask for at the college? We did not deal with the public school system very long as they were not helpful and only allowed 3 months of OT as at that time (3rd grade) it was not affecting his grades. We have done all of his therapy and social skills classes outside of the school system. By the way we did chelation as both my boys had lead poisoning from the faucet in my kitchen sink - While we were doing chelation many different metals came out and about 6 months after we stopped this treatment we saw a Huge difference in his socialability he actually joined conversations and had friends. He has also had his first girlfriend since the beginning of the school year. I'm sorry to go on so long but any info you might give would be greatly appreciated. Thank you for all you do.

Answer
Hi Betsy,

Yes, HFA/AS/PDD-NOS people can and do complete college degrees. I know of three PhD's, (there are many) some of whom have books I will recommend at the end of this answer.

Turning in papers is a hard thing from most kids on spectrum. It is not immediate enough to stay on their radar. Those who succeed develop a system to keep themselves reminded to follow through. Our daughter used a simple whiteboard mounted beside her apartment door. She saw it every time she went out. Others use Outlook or another calendar program to pop up alerts at appropriate intervals. He has to design a system that works for him. He is not in a structured environment now, he has to create his own structure.

Freshman year is hard for all students. Having his first girl friend is a wonderful thing, but also a big distraction. It happens to many of us (myself included) that leaving home gives us more freedom to fail. Most students refocus and put in more effort once they realize the error of their ways. The bottom line is HE has to WANT it more than anything else.

Pre-professional programs are pretty unforgiving. They weed out those who have difficulties pretty early. I do not know if the college will grant him any accommodations. Usually, these amount to some extra time on tests and tutoring. No one is going to remind him to do his homework. He will have to have his diagnostic papers in order and, usually, a fresh diagnosis less than three years old to even be recognized as "disabled."

I hate to say it, but students with ADHD and spectrum disorders are discriminated against on this score. They are the only disabled people who must continuously re-validate their diagnosis to qualify for accommodations.

Here are the books I recommend you and your son read:

"Ask and Tell" edited by Stephen Shore -- a collection of essays by autistic and A.S. young adults about whether, how and when to reveal their diagnosis in the higher education and/or work world.

“Developing Talents: Careers for Individuals with Asperger Syndrome and High-Functioning Autism” by Dr. Temple Grandin, Kate Duffy, and Tony Attwood

I know it is hard, but I think it is very important for us, as parents of spectrum children, to be supportive without rescuing our twice gifted offspring. No child learns to stand on his/her own feet without falling down and getting up by themselves. Usually more than once. Be his best cheerleader, but don't send out the lifeboat too quickly.

I hope it all works out for him. He may find his passion in another field if pharmacy proves unsuitable. By all means, he should NOT drop out of college, entirely.

Best wishes,
Catherine