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About Trey McGowan
Expertise
My primary expertise is in the area of the social, psychological, and mental development of Aspergers Syndrome and other high-functioning Autistic Spectrum Disorders. I am also very knowledgeable in the communication disorders and common co-existing issues. I'm well-read on most of these as well as having experienced it myself. Other aspects of autism, I can do fairly well at as well, from the oversensitivity to the recognition of it. Warning: I am *not* a medical professional, and while I can research answers through books and online, I can not give direct medical expertise.

Experience
I am 14 years diagnosed Asperger's Autistic, and have been reading up and studying it, as well as taking 'first hand accounts' for most of those 14 years. In addition, I have had three children, adopted elsewhere, all of whom are varying degrees of autistic from mid to high functioning. My mother has done some research on the subject as well, and passed some of it on to me.

Education/Credentials
I have completed grade school and most of high school, and achieved a GED. I've also received home schooling.

You are here: Experts > Parenting/Family > Parenting Special Needs > Autism > Re: friends adult son who shows signs of autism

Autism - Re: friends adult son who shows signs of autism

Expert: Trey McGowan - 10/23/2009

Question
My question is that I have a friend who has an adult son of 27 who I think has autism. You cannot touch him and he hates strong smells and has ritual things he does. He will not go to a Dr. and nothing can convince him to go. What can my friend do to get him help? He lives in NJ and was wondering if you know of any good Drs there that could help my friend. He doesn't even know where to start to get his son help. Thank you

Answer
Hi there, Diane!

If your friend's son is of age (and at 27, he is), then what must be done is for your friend's son to be the one to either ask for help, or step forward to look for it himself. I understand that your friend wants to help out, but in the end, at 27, the boy is now old enough to be making his own decisions in life. No one can force him to get help; it is up to him, if he wants help, to seek it out. As you said, he will not go to a doctor and nothing will convince him to go. In that way, the best thing they can do to help him is to support him in his decision (whether they understand or agree with it or not) and let him find his own way. The best help in the world is support and love. A doctor often comes secondary to this.

I hope I was able to be of some help in this! I know it's likely not the answer you were hoping to see, but one has to remember that no matter how much one loves a child, when they are an adult, they can make their own decisions for better or worse.

Questions? Comments? Feedback? Follow-ups? Feel free to send them here!

Trey

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