Expert: Valerie Herskowitz - 10/2/2009

Question
I am currently watching a child who is 18 months old and have a son who is 13 months old and is advanced...the child I am watching is not even close to the level my son was on at 9 months much less what level he's close to at this point...This child doesn't eat properly meaning can't pick things up with his hands without extreme difficulty doesn't know how to take bites of things doesn't even attempt to use silverware doesn't chew his food tries to pick it up and shove it down his throat and swallow it whole gorges food obsessively until educes vomitting if you let it Throws tantrums for no reason screaming kicking hitting biting doesn't play well with anyone prefers to be alone only plays with certain items and doesn't even say words other then mommom has very weird reflexes and movements spins his hands and wrist round and round his eyes are not proportioned properly He doesn't respond to his name and acts as if he is totally deaf doesn't know what simple objects are such as his cup doesn't seem to acknowledge what he's doing I was speaking to my aunt about it and she looked up the symptoms and autism is one that popped up can you please give me some info about these things if they could be related to autism or if they are signs or symptoms because every time I speak to the mother about it I get the same reaction of excuses for everything if I am taking care of a child that has special needs I would like to know what I can do about it as far as the necessary steps of reporting it so that he is checked any info you have would be greatly appreciated I know there's something wrong with him and I hate to see him suffering and it takes extreme patience at times to be able to even deal with his actions at times and not even knowing the reason for the action makes it even more difficult

Answer
Hi Angel
You are probably correct-it seems that there are issues with this child. Very possibly autism.

Now the hard part-I don't know how effective you can be if the mother is resistant to suggestions. Perhaps, focusing on the lack of speech-some parents have an easier time accepting a language delay. Then the other issues will can be addressed later.

You really can't report it, but you can suggest to the mom that she write me directly at info@valerieherskowitz.com. Maybe if she is in contact with someone who is a professional she would be open to some suggestions.

It takes patience to be with a child like that and patience to wait until the mom is open to suggestions-don't give up. You are really living up to your name