Expert: Jene Aviram - 6/27/2009

Question
My son (10) was diagnosed with Aspergers 4 years ago. My daughter is almost 6 and as a baby nursed continuously! As a toddler she would constantly scream w/o reason in the car and mouthed everything. She even "ate" the wooden shade, and cupfulls of sand, etc. Even now when nervous, she eats until sick. She never played with toys but threw and climbed them, never napped more than 15 min as a toddler and chewed a hole in the playpen I rarely used. I homeschool my kids. When I tried to put her in school last year, she would hide from the teacher or cry from "stomache aches" until I would get her. When her dad is out of town she refuses to have a bm or eat. Lately she's afraid of the dark. She smothers people, shares food with strangers and gets into everyones personal space, like grabbing other people's dads at the pool. She is academically very smart but extremely messy and does lots of naughty things still, like getting things soaking wet in the bathroom sink for no reason. She now plays with legos but mostly just destroys stuff. It is so stressful to take her anywhere. Relatives can only handle a bit of her because its like there is no off button!
Could she also have AS even though she and her brother are so very different. Or is it something else?

Answer
Hi Helen,

I'm sure you've heard the expression, "If you've met one child with autism, then you've met one child with autism."
Whether you are diagnosed with autism or Aspergers, people on the autism spectrum are all unique.  There are a subset of commonalities, but not all people share the same symptoms.
Therefore, the answer is yes.  Your daughter could have AS even though she is completely different to her brother.

I think the biggest question right now is "What is going on for your daughter?"  Whether it's AS, anxiety disorder, sensory issues or something else, she is clearly having a difficult time.  I'm sure it must take a toll on you as well.  It's so hard when we don't know what to do to help our child.

I suggest that you take your daughter for a comprehensive evaluation.  From what you've said, she certainly has some sensory challenges and this can be greatly helped by an OT who specializes in sensory issues.  I'm sure she can also benefit greatly from a therapist who specializes in behavior management.  This will help her with personal space etc.

Call your pediatrician and let him know that you're concerned that your daughter might have Aspergers.  Ask him for a referral.  You can also seek a developmental pediatrician or a child psychologist that specializes in behavior disorders such as ASD, ADHD etc.

I believe the whole picture will be clearer once you have an evaluation as you'll receive a course of action on how to proceed.

You certainly have a lot on your plate!  I wish you lots of luck and a successful plan of action.

Jene Aviram
http://www.nlconcepts.com