Expert: Paul Johnson - 10/5/2010

Question
I have a 5 yr. with autism. He has been sticking his hands in womens shirts, even when told to stop, and explained the "private parts" rules. As of yesterday he started doing this "tickle tickle" thing and will reach down by my genital area. I've told him to stop, again explaining the "private part" rule and he did it again today.  He does have a sensory deficit and I know autistic kids do display some inappropriate sexual behavior - and when I tickle his belly of underarms I say "tickle tickle". When I ask him who tickles his privates he just "I Aron tickle," then he'll yell "No touch private parts" (I've been re-enforcing that if any1 touches him there to just yell that phrase as loud as he can over and over). I am calling his nuero. in the morning, but I can't sleep tonight, so here I am. Is this normal?  Do you think some one is hurting my baby? Please help!!!!!!!!!! He says no school but goes and has had all good days so far this yr.  He will sleep over my moms and usually does good, sometimes at bed time he will cry for me.  He goes to his dads every other wkend and 2 evenings a wk.  For a while he would become very upset saying he didn't want to go and I didn't force him, then he was fine and started going with no problem.  Now every once in a while he will insist on not going and I'm afraid one has to do with the other.  I don't work, I'm with him all the time, so I don't know if he's just use to mom.  He will tell me and his dad "I no go I stay mommy's home" (he doen't talk a whole lot), God please don't let me be sending him to the wolves!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

Answer
Hey Barbie,

Thank you for your challenging and provocative question.

Let start with language. Individuals on the spectrum are challenged with language. I believe the answer to your question lies in this domain. It appears he is at the classic Autism level of functioning. As such any language development for a 5 year old is good. He is likely receiving reinforcement from repeating what he hears. I think he is saying bad touch because that is what you tell him and in a sense is executing echolalia. I think he also is doing the very thing that draws your greatest attention. I think this is what motivates this behavior. He is comfortable being the "Bad" boy.

For an Autistic child his age it will take a while to learn boundaries, when some touch is "Charged" behavior. I think this is the extent of his behaviors, so don't worry.

I am assuming that you may have eliminated his dad as the origin of his behaviors.