Expert: Jene Aviram - 2/18/2010

Question
My son looks like your average little boy, but we have always thought something was different about him since he was a baby. I took him to church this last Sunday and to Nursery there. There was a couple over the Nursery who has an autistic son. They asked me a few questions because they noticed some things in his behavior and were wondering if he was autistic too. They saidthat he would not play with any of the other children. He would color on everyone else’s coloring sheet, except his own. He would play with everyone else’s play dough and not his own. He was only focused on the door and escaping. He escaped 5 times, even with a childproof doorknob.
I do have lots of these problems at home as well. We have childproof locks on all our doors, even in his bedroom. He does not take naps during the day and will be very tired by night. By night time, he is on "wired" energy and is extremely hyper. We go thru our normal night time routine to put him to bed
(which he loves). We will tuck him in, but he will get up as soon as we leave the room and will play for an hour and a half before going back to bed. He wakes up throughout the night and will play. We put him back to bed several times throughout the night. He wakes up every morning at 6:00am and begins to play
some more. We put him to bed around 10:00pm, and he arises around 6:00 or 7:00... up several times in the night and no naps during the day.
He does not respond to his name. He sometimes asks as if he is deaf. We will tell him we have a piece of candy for him and he still will not respond or look at us. He stays focused on whatever he is doing. I have to say "look at me" several times and eventually, manually, turn his head to look at me. Even then,
his eyes will try to point at what he was focusing on. He does respond sometimes, but most of the time not. He loves staring at the spinning CD in a CD player. He seems hyperactive all the time and is always "on the go" (that's why he is even crazier the later it gets, because he gets so tired). He does not like to be held and has never been a cuddle baby. He just wants to be put down so he can run or do his own thing. He is very independent. We have to keep him strapped in a stroller wherever we go, because he will run off and does not care if we are with him. If we go to drive somewhere, once I open the door, he rushes
out and runs off. I have to climb in the car, start it, honk the horn and pretend to drive away before he comes back. Sometimes he still does not care if I drive off, so I have to get out, chase him, and put him in the car. We love
him so much and want him to know that we love him, but he seems not to care. Everything has to be his way and he has no time for us to hug or kiss him. Even when we do snatch him and hug and kiss him, he seems to tune us out.
He says very few words and only one at a time. He loves shapes and colors and will point them out. Things are only identified by their shape. If he wants a chip, he will say "circle". He is a very picky eater and will not eat, even if he hasn't eaten all day, unless it is one of the foods he likes. We are limited
to Macaroni and cheese, eggs, chicken nuggets and juice. I have put chicken in his macaroni and he will not eat it. If I put pepper, or anything he can see, in his eggs, he will not eat them. If I cook his eggs a little too long and they have a little bit of brown on them, he will not eat them. He will only eat
McDonalds Nuggets. The breading has to be a certain way, or he will not eat them. He will drink any juice though.
He seems to act before he thinks. He will throw a tantrum and go to hit or bite the person. He knows he is not suppose to and he will catch himself before he actually bites or hits someone. He will start to put his teeth on you or swing his hand to hit, but stop before because he realizes what he is doing. He shows
little interest in other children. He prefers to play alone. The only time he is interested in other children is when he goes to hug them, when they don't want to be hugged and ends up knocking them down. We went to the park the other day
and he played by himself. Later, he started throwing wood chips at the children and enjoyed chasing them. We eventually had to leave. He would get distracted by a slide, or a set of stairs, but go back and start chasing the kids again with
the wood chips. Also, ever since he learned to walk, he has been walking on his toes.
Whenever we go to someone’s house, he has to walk thru the whole house to know his surroundings, unless he gets distracted by a dog or cat. He does not mind to have furniture moved around in my house though. He is okay with change, just has
to know where everything is.
I kept telling myself for the longest time that he is just a hyper little toddler, until my friend asked if he was autistic. Please let me know what this could possibly sound like autism, or if this sounds like something else. I want to make sure I get him tested for the right thing. We are desperate to know what is going on and want the best for our son. Thanks!

Answer
Hi Bonnie,

You did not say how old your son was which makes this question a little harder to answer.  If your son is 18 months or older then I do believe you have cause for concern.  I'm NOT saying that he is on the autism spectrum.  One can never diagnose over the Internet and you will need a comprehensive evaluation to determine that.

Your son does have some red flags such as not responding to his name and preferring to play alone.  If I were in your shoes I would ask your pediatrician who you can contact for early intervention (this is if he is under three.)  You can also go to a Developmental Pediatrician.  Don't worry about "testing him for the right thing."  Each professional you see will be familiar with all childhood disorders.  Besides, a diagnosis of any kind really just serves as a means to get services.

Have you heard of the M-CHAT?  It's for 18 to 30 month old's and here is a link.  Answer the questions and click "Show me now."  It will tell you if you should be concerned.  http://www.nlconcepts.com/autism-mchat.htm

Also, here is an article called "How do you know if your child has autism?"  I think it might help you as it has all the characteristics and behaviors you are likely to see if your child is on the autism spectrum.  http://www.nlconcepts.com/autism-howdoyouknow.htm

I would like to tell you that your little guy is not able to express that he knows you love him.  And he probably is not able to express how much he loves you.  But he does.  Oh boy, he does and he knows you love him too.  And he is really thriving on that.  So keep doing just what you're doing.  You sound like a wonderful mom who is caring, loving and so generous spirited.  

I wish you great success and I hope this has been of some help.

Jene Aviram
http://www.nlconcepts.com