Expert: Valerie Herskowitz - 6/4/2011

Question
I have an 19 year old son, who has Asperger's syndrome.
Recently I'd discovered he'd been looking at pornography online.
Not hard-core or sexy/explicit stuff, merely pictures of women in the Next catalogue, in the businesswear section, pictures of crowds on flickr.com (non-explicit photos, ordinary, everyday people] and pictures of Helen Worth (Gail off Coronation Street).

Should I be concerned? It doesn't seem to be a big part of his internet surfing, most of his internet surfing is things like bodybuilding, cookery, health issues, financial advice, discount coupons for shopping [physical not online shops] etc. He obviously isn't addicted/that much interested in it if bodybuilding/financial advice etc. makes up the bulk of his surfing, I'd say porn made up about 5% of it possibly - a low ballpark figure.

I did have "the talk" with him about it, and he said he knows pornography is unrealistic, hence his choice of pictures to look at.

Does what he looks at even count as pornography?

He's never had a girlfriend, and is a mostly sensible well-adjusted young man, although prone to depression about this area of his life - the lack of a girlfriend.

He does have friends, but they're all male, and do very much macho things like motorcycle racing, bodybuilding, skiing indoors etc. (we live in the UK).

Should I be worried or not?

BTW, his 17 year old brother (non-asperger's) seems MORE interested in pornography than my son does, isn't this an area I should be concerned with?

What would you advise on this area? Is it even normal for someone with autism/Asperger's to even look at/be interested in pornography?



* Sent via a VPN from public terminal - on the move.

Answer
Hi Jane

Doesn't sound like pornography to me. Seems just like he is enjoying looking at pretty women in a healthy way. I would be concerned if he was looking at it constantly or obsessively, but it doesn't seem that way. So from my point of view, it sounds fine.

Meanwhile, it's nice he has guy friends. He is obviously interested in the females,but maybe he is not ready to deal with it in a real sense. Do you have a psychologist that he can talk to about these things or a local place that offers social skill programs for young adults?

I do work on the telephone with young adults if you think it would benefit him. Just let me know and we can set something up.

Take care