Expert: Valerie Herskowitz - 7/18/2011

Question
Hi Valerie,

My 3 yr old daughter does not make eye contact and does not talk. Is this a sign of autism. What do I need to do to her help, can this be treated. Please let me know. We have already started with speech therapy for her, 2 sessions a week. Speech therapist seems confident that there will be improvement in her speech in a month but I am concerned if this could be autism.

She is otherwise a active child, loves listening to stories from her elder sister, loves going to the park, likes picture books. She is able to speak few words like mamma , papa etc and points us out and her sis and grand parents  in photographs. She does not say what she wants, like if she is thirsty , she will bring the water bottle and a glass and give it us rather than saying that she wants water. She drag us by the hand to things that she wants , and would look at the thing and scream instead of saying what she wants. Even if we ask her, she would still not repeat. She throws tantrums when she doesnt get her way.

We have started sending her to play school, however her play school teacher says that she doesnt follow instructions at all.

She does not understand most of what we say to her, however she does understand the only some of usual instructions and follows.

Please help , I do not know what to do here.

Answer
Hi Meg
Though as a speech pathologist I am not allowed to diagnose autism, the fact that your daughter is not speaking, not following directions at her age, throws tantrums, and doesn't make eye contact, you should take her to a developmental pediatrician or pediatric neurologist or psychologist who deals with developmental delays. The characteristics that you outlined in your letter are red flags for a developmental delay like autism.

I am glad that you have started speech therapy. I hope you are taking her to see someone that works with children who don't speak. I would highly recommend that you begin training with using either sign language or a picture communication system (whichever is easier for her) to get her going on her communication even before she learns to speak. You want to use something systematic so you can break her habit of having to drag you to what she wants. Being that her speech abilities appear to be limited to just a handful of words and she doesn't repeat you, she has something called dyspraxia. This means that it may be some time before she can speak enough to communicate her wants and needs, so in the meantime, you want to give her a way to do that.

If you want, I do private consultations via Skype. If you ever want to do one with me, just email me at info@valerieherskowitz.com

Good luck and keep me in the loop.