Expert: Catherine Ridenour - 5/14/2007

Question
Hi,
My son has just turned one years old. I have been reading all the early warning signs for autism and am concerned. I started looking up information because of his head banging. He will bang his head slowly and what seems questioningly on walls but for preference on other peoples heads. Since birth he has avoided eye contact especially with the person holding him. he does not seem to react to being held and does not really respond to his name. I have found it quite hard to mother him as he seems emotionally detached and worry that it is just a missing connection between us. I read that they should point at objects and pretend play , this he is not doing, or is he still too young do you think? he wont hold his own bottle of milk but can feed himself with his fingers , in fact he loves his food and cries the moment he sees the food till he is eating. In fact as a baby he cried a lot if there was any change , dressing , bathing even pooing made him cry. otherwise he was quiet and happy and is now happy and easy , sleeps well and plays on his own happily. People comment on how un clingy he is , not that this cheers me.
My husband does not think anything is wrong and that i am too sensitive. Could you just tell me if these things seem worth worring about and going to find a specialist - I have mentioned to my doctor that i was worried but he said that as he interacted with me i.e. dropping an object to be picked up, that he was not autistic.
many thanks
rosie

Answer
Hi Rosie,

Maybe there is a problem and maybe not. Taken all together, head banging, avoiding eye contact, not enjoying being held, not reponding to his name and crying about most changes could indicate an autistic spectrum disorder. It can also indicate a hearing problem. Be sure he has been checked for deafness.

All children should respond to their name well before one year of age. He should look at things you point out and he should try to get your attention to look at things he finds interesting. He should make attempts to get you to play with him and to give him things he wants, like a toy or a treat. He should be using single words or sounds that have meaning to get his needs met. For instance, "up" or "uh" for pick me up, "bye bye", "dink" (drink), "mama or ma", "night-night" etc. If he is making no effort to talk, I would be greatly concerned. The words don't have to be correct, he just needs to be trying.

If he is your first child, you and your husband don't have any experience to compare him with. This was the case for us and our daughter. I had no idea how different she was until I saw her with other children her age. And when we had our second and third children, I realized how different she had been as a baby.

Don't blame yourself for his seeming lack of attachment. You did not make him autistic, if he is, and it is NOT your fault. Don't ever let anyone guilt trip you. And, just by the way, I do NOT believe that vaccinations cause autism. My daughter was strange before she ever had her first shots.

Try joining a play group and observing him around other children his age. If his behavior is very different from his age peers, it's time to push his doctor to refer him for an evaluation. Don't take no for an answer. You know your child better than anyone and you are his best advocate.

Best wishes,
Catherine