Spiritual Awakening, Growth, and Enlightenment/Meditation


Hello Ms/Mrs. Rita,

I've recently been researching the "Laws of Attraction" and have been setting time aside every morning to speak positive thoughts of love and peace to myself because I have terrible self esteem and my life is so off balanced. I'm a 38 year old woman with no children, my personal relationships ALWAYS fail, I never complete tasks - like school (6 credits away) because of stress, stress, stress. I'm a binge eater and I'm hell on wheels at work. Despite these things I have a heart of gold and will do anything for anyone and do not know my boundaries which causes me to get hurt a lot.  I say all of this so that you can get a small picture of my struggles - lifelong.

Since I've been doing this morning ritual I've been viewing myself a lot differently internally and I'm starting to love the physical me, but things at work and with family are staying the same. I did cross paths yesterday with an old school mate who has also embarked upon this way of thinking and is also a Vegan, something I'm striving to become - which I recognized immediately as my positive morning ritual coming into play - I ask for positive people to enter my life and days later there he was.

My question is - Can you make a suggestion of what I need to do to calm down completely while at work or make things better with family? I know I can't change the actions of others - but I struggle with changing my reaction to it.  I'm not even sure what I do in the morning is called Meditation, but I would love any advice you can offer?

Thank you for your time, sorry for the book and have a wonderful day!

Hey LJ,
Thanks for reaching out.  So, you're looking for a suggestion to help you calm down?  The practice that I use is about being OK with where I am.  In other words, you have a whole story about why you are where you are and where you want to be and the striving you are doing to get there.  It sounds exhausting!

And the reason it sounds and may feel exhausting is because you don't want to be where you are.  If you could be OK with where you are at this moment, you calm down.  You relax just a bit and then you can slowly move to a better feeling place.  You are in a habit of reaction and then reacting to the reaction and then you stay in that cycle.  Not fun.

SO, play with this.  "I am where I am and that's OK"  It's OK because it is where I am!  See how that feels.  Don't even try to move to a better feeling state until you can accept where you are, warts and all.  YOu have to love yourself through this process and loving yourself means accepting what is for this moment.

Hope that helps.

Spiritual Awakening, Growth, and Enlightenment

All Answers

Answers by Expert:

Ask Experts


Rita Desnoyers-Garcia


I can answer questions about abundance, the law of attraction, peace, and love. My passions are about how to access the Higher Self/Source, spiritual development, relationships. I can't answer questions about how your future will turn out.


I have gone through my own spiritual transformation and am a coach and teacher to many women, especially mothers, who are seeking a better connection to Source and joy in their lives. I was living a life of quiet desperation as a suburban mother of three, when I hit a big crisis. I had read and learned from metaphysical teachers about how to connect with who you really are before, but until I hit bottom, I didn't really understand. I then started to work with a coach and studied many teachers when I had a transformation that led to my inspiration to help others.

http://www.ezinearticles.com, Inner Realm magazine, The Motherlode magazine. I have authored a book and online course called "Extraordinary Abundance: Ten Simple Ways to Uncover the Richness of Your Life" and the CD "The Forest Meditations"

I have a Masters of Social Work from Columbia University and a 10 year career working with women focusing on helping them reach their potential. I have read extensively about the Law of Attraction, accessing the Now, belief work, releasing techniques, accessing peace and abundance. I had used this material on myself and others with amazing results.

Past/Present Clients
Most of my clients are mothers who are searching for a deeper,more meaningful life for themselves and their families. I also work with women and men who are looking for guidance and support with personal and business issues.

©2016 About.com. All rights reserved.