Spiritual Awakening, Growth, and Enlightenment/Desperately want to have faith and overcome anxiety-thank you in advance
Hello Brother Dave and thank you in advance for your time and help-even a bit of advice would be appreciated. I am going through what I feel is a crisis right now and at the same time feel desperate to find spirituality and fully believe and trust in God. I am 25 and going through extreme issues with anxiety- it's keeping me from living a positive life it's so bad- and it's stressing my mother out to the point that she says I'm going to end up causing her to have a heart attack/she's broken down by me etc....I am causing her suffering by my own issues with anxiety. My anxiety issue is constant worrying about things- trying to control things- not wanting to do things because of what ifs and what ifs filling my head with anxiety. My main fear is something bad happening to my loved ones and it being even worse if it were somehow my fault- it's so hard. For instance, and this is just one of my current worries that's keeping me anxious almost constantly, currently my mom was so happy about getting a pool installed- I at first went along with it happily, agreeing with her how it would bring the family together, relieve stress, be healthy exercise, but now am putting her and myself through extreme stress about it (getting paranoid that something bad could happen to the family children..etc.) that she says I'm making her miserable and now she can't even be happy about it anymore-she has gone through extreme emotional breakdowns because of me over something that I helped initiate and that for most families would be positive... I don't know what to do...I always end up freaking out about things, trying to keep bad things from happening by avoiding things/trying to control things, and finding ways to blame myself for things- for an example, say I suggested we go to the park and one of my family members gets hurt while there- that would be my fault because of my suggestion. Or if a toy I bought hurt my niece or nephew-that'd be my fault. That's what my life is like right now. I feel so lost because all I want is to feel positive about life and have faith and believe my loved ones are safe and things will work out good but it's hard. In my past I've had bad things happen- my grandmother was in an accident which is maybe why it's hard for me...I can't shake the idea of "bad things" and I'm terrified of life because of it. I don't live fully because of my fears.. I want to live a life of faith...I want to be positive and be healed from my anxiety- I want to stop making my mom miserable- I want to stop thinking like this. I want to believe in God and feel like my family is protected by God so I can be okay about life. I feel like I'm existing...not living..and causing my mom to do the same. Don't get me wrong, I feel blessed and grateful in many ways and have moments where I believe in God because of who I have in my life, but so fearful/doubtful at the same time, because I can't stand the thought of anything happening I can't handle. I probably sound like a lunatic but please if you could help me with this, even a bit of advice- I'd appreciate it so much..Thank you again for your time. I'm so sorry this got so long!
Dear Autumn in the Family of God,
Our Sovereign Savior and friend Jesus Christ, here in Spirit, inspires each of us: "Fear not ! Let not your heart be troubled ! Be of good cheer ! I AM with you always my beloved child of God !"
All humans start out early in life with natural fears of being in a new, unfamiliar, large universe. These negative emotions control the mind at first, until much experience, human wisdom, and then spiritual faith dominate. On average, a human will be able to have some enhanced mind control to remove unreasoned fears anxieties and doubts around age 35 years-on. Be patient with yourself; know always that God really unconditionally and perfectly loves you and all humans equally ...
On a practical level, there are some natural mood elevating foods and supplements such as St. John's Wort and others widely available without prescription. Always check with a doctor first for safe advice and dosage, or take the minimum for a few weeks to see if it helps with no adverse effects. Get eight hours sleep each night. Take 10 minutes or longer each morning, noon and evening to go to a quiet place in a room or out in beautiful nature to deep breathe, calm down, pray, reflect, meditate, and worship as you feel so led in God's Spirit within you.
As you and others read and reflect on these selected paragraphs from the 2097 page "The Urantia Book" revelation, which is in the public domain to allow free sharing, I am certain that some of these quotes will be of help, especially after repeated readings and reflections. They help and encourage me for over 39 years to date. See http://www.Urantia.org
to freely read much more.
12:9.5 Your religion is becoming real because it is emerging from the slavery of fear and the bondage of superstition.
34:6.13 The consciousness of the spirit domination of a human life is presently attended by an increasing exhibition of the characteristics of the Spirit in the life reactions of such a spirit-led mortal, “for the fruits of the spirit are love, joy, peace, long-suffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, and temperance.” Such spirit-guided and divinely illuminated mortals, while they yet tread the lowly paths of toil and in human faithfulness perform the duties of their earthly assignments, have already begun to discern the lights of eternal life as they glimmer on the faraway shores of another world; already have they begun to comprehend the reality of that inspiring and comforting truth, “The kingdom of God is not meat and drink but righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit.” And throughout every trial and in the presence of every hardship, spirit-born souls are sustained by that hope which transcends all fear because the love of God is shed abroad in all hearts by the presence of the divine Spirit.
34:7.8 Having started out on the way of life everlasting, having accepted the assignment and received your orders to advance, do not fear the dangers of human forgetfulness and mortal inconstancy, do not be troubled with doubts of failure or by perplexing confusion, do not falter and question your status and standing, for in every dark hour, at every crossroad in the forward struggle, the Spirit of Truth will always speak, saying, “This is the way.”
48:7.4 2. Few persons live up to the faith which they really have. Unreasoned fear is a master intellectual fraud practiced upon the evolving mortal soul.
48:7.21 19. Anxiety must be abandoned. The disappointments hardest to bear are those which never come.
100:5.2 The progression of religious growth leads from stagnation through conflict to co-ordination, from insecurity to undoubting faith, from confusion of cosmic consciousness to unification of personality, from the temporal objective to the eternal, from the bondage of fear to the liberty of divine sonship. [All humans are sons of God; the daughters of God are the many types of angels.]
101:0.1 RELIGION, as a human experience, ranges from the primitive fear slavery of the evolving savage up to the sublime and magnificent faith liberty of those civilized mortals who are superbly conscious of sonship with the eternal God.
102:6.7 Belief may not be able to resist doubt and withstand fear, but faith is always triumphant over doubting, for faith is both positive and living. The positive always has the advantage over the negative, truth over error, experience over theory, spiritual realities over the isolated facts of time and space. The convincing evidence of this spiritual certainty consists in the social fruits of the spirit which such believers, faithers, yield as a result of this genuine spiritual experience. Said Jesus: “If you love your fellows as I have loved you, then shall all men know that you are my disciples.”
108:5.8 The Thought Adjusters [God's Spirit Presence Gift within you, the pure will of God, ever seeking to transforfm and perfect you eternally !] would like to change your feelings of fear to convictions of love and confidence; but they cannot mechanically and arbitrarily do such things; that is your task. In executing those decisions which deliver you from the fetters of fear, you literally supply the psychic fulcrum on which the Adjuster may subsequently apply a spiritual lever of uplifting and advancing illumination.
113:2.5 The angels develop an abiding affection for their human associates; and you would, if you could only visualize the seraphim, develop a warm affection for them. Divested of material bodies, given spirit forms, you would be very near the angels in many attributes of personality. They share most of your emotions and experience some additional ones. The only emotion actuating you which is somewhat difficult for them to comprehend is the legacy of animal fear that bulks so large in the mental life of the average inhabitant of Urantia. The angels really find it hard to understand why you will so persistently allow your higher intellectual powers, even your religious faith, to be so dominated by fear, so thoroughly demoralized by the thoughtless panic of dread and anxiety.
130:6.3 [Jesus, to a young man who was afraid of life and lived alone in the mountains of Crete] By this time the young man very much desired to talk with Jesus, and he knelt at his feet imploring Jesus to help him, to show him the way of escape from his world of personal sorrow and defeat. Said Jesus: “My friend, arise! Stand up like a man! You may be surrounded with small enemies and be retarded by many obstacles, but the big things and the real things of this world and the universe are on your side. The sun rises every morning to salute you just as it does the most powerful and prosperous man on earth. Look — you have a strong body and powerful muscles — your physical equipment is better than the average. Of course, it is just about useless while you sit out here on the mountainside and grieve over your misfortunes, real and fancied. But you could do great things with your body if you would hasten off to where great things are waiting to be done. You are trying to run away from your unhappy self, but it cannot be done. You and your problems of living are real; you cannot escape them as long as you live. But look again, your mind is clear and capable. Your strong body has an intelligent mind to direct it. Set your mind at work to solve its problems; teach your intellect to work for you; refuse longer to be dominated by fear like an unthinking animal. Your mind should be your courageous ally in the solution of your life problems rather than your being, as you have been, its abject fear-slave and the bond servant of depression and defeat. But most valuable of all, your potential of real achievement is the spirit which lives within you, and which will stimulate and inspire your mind to control itself and activate the body if you will release it from the fetters of fear and thus enable your spiritual nature to begin your deliverance from the evils of inaction by the power-presence of living faith. And then, forthwith, will this faith vanquish fear of men by the compelling presence of that new and all-dominating love of your fellows which will so soon fill your soul to overflowing because of the consciousness which has been born in your heart that you are a child of God.
130:6.4 “This day, my son, you are to be reborn, re-established as a man of faith, courage, and devoted service to man, for God’s sake. And when you become so readjusted to life within yourself, you become likewise readjusted to the universe; you have been born again — born of the spirit — and henceforth will your whole life become one of victorious accomplishment. Trouble will invigorate you; disappointment will spur you on; difficulties will challenge you; and obstacles will stimulate you. Arise, young man! Say farewell to the life of cringing fear and fleeing cowardice. Hasten back to duty and live your life in the flesh as a son of God, a mortal dedicated to the ennobling service of man on earth and destined to the superb and eternal service of God in eternity.”
137:1.6 [Jesus said, in part] "...be not mindful of those things which foster your anxiety but rather at all times concern yourselves only with doing the will of the Father who is in heaven.”
142:5.3 [Jesus:] “The Supreme Spirit shall bear witness with your Spirits [God within you !] that you are truly the children of God. And if you are the sons of God, then have you been born of the Spirit of God; and whosoever has been born of the Spirit has in himself the power to overcome all doubt, and this is the victory that overcomes all uncertainty, even your faith.
142:5.4 [Jesus:] “Said the Prophet Isaiah, speaking of these times: ‘When the spirit is poured upon us from on high, then shall the work of righteousness become peace, quietness, and assurance forever.’ And for all who truly believe this gospel, I will become surety for their reception into the eternal mercies and the everlasting life of my Father’s kingdom. You, then, who hear this message and believe this gospel of the kingdom are the sons of God, and you have life everlasting; and the evidence to all the world that you have been born of the spirit is that you sincerely love one another.”
143:2.4 [Jesus:] “By the old way you seek to suppress, obey, and conform to the rules of living; by the new way you are first transformed by the Spirit of Truth and thereby strengthened in your inner soul by the constant spiritual renewing of your mind, and so are you endowed with the power of the certain and joyous performance of the gracious, acceptable, and perfect will of God. Forget not — it is your personal faith in the exceedingly great and precious promises of God that ensures your becoming partakers of the divine nature. Thus by your faith and the spirit’s transformation, you become in reality the temples of God, and his spirit actually dwells within you. If, then, the spirit dwells within you, you are no longer bondslaves of the flesh but free and liberated sons of the spirit. The new law of the spirit endows you with the liberty of self-mastery in place of the old law of the fear of self-bondage and the slavery of self-denial.
143:2.7 [Jesus:]“Your sonship is grounded in faith, and you are to remain unmoved by fear. Your joy is born of trust in the divine word, and you shall not therefore be led to doubt the reality of the Father’s love and mercy. It is the very goodness of God that leads men into true and genuine repentance. Your secret of the mastery of self is bound up with your faith in the indwelling spirit, which ever works by love. Even this saving faith you have not of yourselves; it also is the gift of God. And if you are the children of this living faith, you are no longer the bondslaves of self but rather the triumphant masters of yourselves, the liberated sons of God.
147:3.3 [Jesus:] "...You are all God’s children; you are the sons of the heavenly Father. The bonds of time may seem to afflict you, but the God of eternity loves you. And when the time of judgment shall come, fear not, you shall all find, not only justice, but an abundance of mercy. Verily, verily, I say to you: He who hears the gospel of the kingdom and believes in this teaching of sonship with God, has eternal life; already are such believers passing from judgment and death to light and life. And the hour is coming in which even those who are in the tombs shall hear the voice of the resurrection.”
157:2.2 [Jesus:] "...Even now you should begin to find deliverance from the bondage of fear and doubt as you enter upon the living of the new life of faith and hope. And when the feelings of service for your fellow men arise within your soul, do not stifle them; when the emotions of love for your neighbor well up within your heart, give expression to such urges of affection in intelligent ministry to the real needs of your fellows.”
159:3.8 The world is filled with hungry souls who famish in the very presence of the bread of life; men die searching for the very God who lives within them. Men seek for the treasures of the kingdom with yearning hearts and weary feet when they are all within the immediate grasp of living faith. Faith is to religion what sails are to a ship; it is an addition of power, not an added burden of life. There is but one struggle for those who enter the kingdom, and that is to fight the good fight of faith. The believer has only one battle, and that is against doubt — unbelief.
159:5.5 [Bible, and quoted in approval by Jesus:] “For I, the Lord your God, will hold your right hand, saying, fear not; I will help you."
165:3.3 [Jesus:] “Soon, very soon, will the things which our enemies now plan in secrecy and in darkness be brought out into the light and be proclaimed from the housetops. But I say to you, my friends, when they seek to destroy the Son of Man, be not afraid of them. Fear not those who, although they may be able to kill the body, after that have no more power over you. I admonish you to fear none, in heaven or on earth, but to rejoice in the knowledge of Him who has power to deliver you from all unrighteousness and to present you blameless before the judgment seat of a universe.
165:3.4 [Jesus:] “Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? And yet, when these birds flit about in quest of their sustenance, not one of them exists without the knowledge of the Father, the source of all life. To the seraphic guardians the very hairs of your head are numbered. And if all of this is true, why should you live in fear of the many trifles which come up in your daily lives? I say to you: Fear not; you are of much more value than many sparrows.
170:2.1 The Master made it clear that the kingdom of heaven must begin with, and be centered in, the dual concept of the truth of the fatherhood of God and the correlated fact of the brotherhood of man. The acceptance of such a teaching, Jesus declared, would liberate man from the age-long bondage of animal fear and at the same time enrich human living with the following endowments of the new life of spiritual liberty:
170:2.2 1. The possession of new courage and augmented spiritual power. The gospel of the kingdom was to set man free and inspire him to dare to hope for eternal life.
190:5.4 As they walked along, [the recently resurrected] Jesus said to them: “How slow you are to comprehend the truth! When you tell me that it is about the teachings and work of this man that you have your discussions, then may I enlighten you since I am more than familiar with these teachings. Do you not remember that this Jesus always taught that his kingdom was not of this world, and that all men, being the sons of God, should find liberty and freedom in the spiritual joy of the fellowship of the brotherhood of loving service in this new kingdom of the truth of the heavenly Father’s love? Do you not recall how this Son of Man proclaimed the salvation of God for all men, ministering to the sick and afflicted and setting free those who were bound by fear and enslaved by evil? Do you not know that this man of Nazareth told his disciples that he must go to Jerusalem, be delivered up to his enemies, who would put him to death, and that he would arise on the third day? Have you not been told all this? And have you never read in the Scriptures concerning this day of salvation for Jew and gentile, where it says that in him shall all the families of the earth be blessed; that he will hear the cry of the needy and save the souls of the poor who seek him; that all nations shall call him blessed? That such a Deliverer shall be as the shadow of a great rock in a weary land. That he will feed the flock like a true shepherd, gathering the lambs in his arms and tenderly carrying them in his bosom. That he will open the eyes of the spiritually blind and bring the prisoners of despair out into full liberty and light; that all who sit in darkness shall see the great light of eternal salvation. That he will bind up the brokenhearted, proclaim liberty to the captives of sin, and open up the prison to those who are enslaved by fear and bound by evil. That he will comfort those who mourn and bestow upon them the joy of salvation in the place of sorrow and heaviness. That he shall be the desire of all nations and the everlasting joy of those who seek righteousness. That this Son of truth and righteousness shall rise upon the world with healing light and saving power; even that he will save his people from their sins; that he will really seek and save those who are lost. That he will not destroy the weak but minister salvation to all who hunger and thirst for righteousness. That those who believe in him shall have eternal life. That he will pour out his spirit upon all flesh, and that this Spirit of Truth shall be in each believer a well of water, springing up into everlasting life. Did you not understand how great was the gospel of the kingdom which this man delivered to you? Do you not perceive how great a salvation has come upon you?”
191:4.4 [Jesus to his apostles, disciples and to us today:] “Go, then, into all the world proclaiming this gospel of the fatherhood of God and the brotherhood of men to all nations and races and ever be wise in your choice of methods for presenting the good news to the different races and tribes of mankind. Freely you have received this gospel of the kingdom, and you will freely give the good news to all nations. Fear not the resistance of evil, for I am with you always, even to the end of the ages. And my peace I leave with you.”