You are here:

BDSM/fantasy to reality sub

Advertisement


Question
how do you know if the reality is really for you.  I've only had vinalla relationships.  I'm always wondering if I'm giving my partner what they need or how they need.  I finally just walk away from relationship's one day.  It's been awhile. Then one day i read this story on line and since then the idea of it driving me nuts. But I'm not a brave person socially never have been.  I don't want to start something I can't finish with someone for that wouldn't be fair to them.  CONFUSED!

Answer
I am not sure where you live but it might be worth while for you to find a local group and attend munches and such and just see if it is what you would like or not.  You can learn a lot on line as well just search and read and learn more about the lifestyle.  Communication is the key in all relationship, you have to be able to ask them if they need or want more as well be able to tell them if you want and need more.

There is no set way in this lifestyle, you take what you like and enjoy try things and some you might keep and want to do again and other no way so you do not use them or have them a part of your relationship.

if you want links and such write me back and I will get them for you.

awhitecloud  

BDSM

All Answers


Answers by Expert:


Ask Experts

Volunteer


awhitecloud

Expertise

Life questions in the area of D/s and real life relationships. I have been active in the Lifestyle for over 18 years and live it real time. Active in local munches for the last 16 years. Have practical life experiences that have brought me to a greater understanding of my self and the lifestyle. There is some part or aspect of the lifestyle in each part of my day. I am constantly thinking about something in the lifestyle. There is no part of my day that is not centered around the D/s lifestyle.

Experience

I have been active in the community for over 19 years. I have been helping people for the last 14 years on a number of boards. And I write articles for different on line as well other D/s publications. Have a published book and am now working on the second one. Helping other as well promoting the lifestyle in a healthy, safe way is what I want to keep trying to do.

Organizations
Spokane Power Exchange. Salem OR area...Wet Spot

Publications
D/s World .... Fbot..."The Subbie Journal" www.Fetlife.com

Education/Credentials
I have finished my Master's degree and have spent a great deal of time in the fields of physiology. And I did a D/s study for my Master's thesis, and I was surprised with the out come. D/s views may not be defined but most all relationships have some aspect of them. Have a D/s book "The subbie Journal? in it's third printing.

Awards and Honors
I have several for best article of the month from D/s World.

©2012 About.com, a part of The New York Times Company. All rights reserved.