Expert: arani_CsA - 11/9/2008

Question
I am a Sadist, and have been in the lifestyle now for 3 yrs. I currently own 3 slaves (1 Transgender and 1 Couple, both are Bisexual) to which I cherish dearly. I have interests in the following:
Flogging, Paddles, Whips, Wax Play, Anal, Humiliation, Collars, Clamps, Sissification, Toys & other items used in BDSM, Collaring Ceremonies, Gags, Spanking, Verbal Domination, Bondage, Electro-Stimulation, PVC & Leather wear, Body Modification, Branding, Extreme Torture, Blindfolding, Scarf Play, Breath Play,and Role-Play Scenes.

I am registered with a majority of the BDSM websites (i.e. CollarMe, Bondage, ALT, etc). I am currently writing a "Slave Contract" and I am also interested in going PRODOMME as well. I have been taught the general rules of "Safe, Sane, and Consensual" not to mention have been researching more into the lifestyle and bringing out my "True" self.

My questions are: Are there any books that I can read to help in my research? Is there anyone online who can assist me in my training? I love to learn.

Answer
Hello, Ma'am...

First of all, I do apologize for the delay in answering your question.  Apparently, the person you originally sent it to didn't answer it and so it was forwarded to the question pool.  However, I hope that I can help you find the answers you are looking for.

To give you a little background information about me, I have been a slave for almost 10 years, but prior to that I was a Domme and have owned three different men in my life.  And so, I have a little knowledge about mastering a slave, both from the giving and the receiving end.  

It has been my experience that you can read about something, be it golf or fashion or BDSM, and you can visit chat rooms and websites and on-line discussion forums.  But the only way to really learn about it is to experience it off line, face to face.  I started out as an on-line slave, and will always value the learning that I gained in that way.  But my real training as a slave began when I was collared to a Master who didn't like to chat and who thought on-line forums were pointless.  What he did was to take me to a weekend gathering of over 100 BDSM'ers, all interacting with each other both socially and in a huge dungeon.  I saw play practices that I had only read about or simulated in a chat room, and I saw how Masters and slaves (and Dominants and submissives, and Tops and bottoms) acted with each other and with others who shared their interests.

My recommendation to you would be to find a BDSM group that meets in your area, and become involved with its members.  (You can find a listing of such groups, by state, at http://www.drkdesyre.com)  Here you can meet other Dominants, as well as slaves and submissives, and speak to them and learn how they do things.  These groups will typically have an on-line discussion forum, but will also have group functions socially in the vanilla realm, as well as in members' homes and dungeons.  

I suggest that, once you get to know the members of such a group, you ask one of the Dominants (male or female) to act as a mentor, and help you more closely to continue your education.  

If you have not already been there, a good site for Femdoms is http://www.wizdomme.com  If you are interested in slavery, and not submission, I recommend http://www.rlslavery.com

Good luck to you in your search, Ma'am.  And if you have any further questions, please feel free to bring them my way.

arani_CsA,
devoted property of Clampius_Arelius