Expert: Master Shadow - 12/30/2008

Question
I am 27 Years old and I have been fantasize BDSM in all its ways the sexual one and extreme one, I have been with my girl (who is very romantic and she is not in to BDSM but she like hard actions) for over 11 years now and due to special religion reasons we never had sex but we had a lot of oral sex occasionally and we agreed that we will have a sex night for the first time soon

We agreed that there will be no penetration just oral sex as she is still virgin and she doesn’t want to lose her virginity before marriage, mainly she asked me to get her to cum (I read your advice regarding the CUNNILINGUS, finger play and anal play and it is very interesting and I learned a lot) so that we can be on the track to what we really want to achieve as we love each other very much and we really want to make each other happy and satisfied

My question is I think I am very sadistic and I want to spank her hardly and she is aware of that and she is willing to try it but she is afraid that the pain will make her out of the mood as it is her first time so (I made 3 floggers by myself and one of them is really hard to take as it is made of plastic material) what is your advice on using these floggers on her? to what limit should I go? What is the right spanking technique?

Sorry for the long story but I had another question, I talked with her about spanking, slapping, throat fucking (to a puking limit – we tried that before), nipple clamps (she loved – we tried it before), tied up (which she love the most), wax, even peeing and she accept to try all this as she is open minded and want to satisfy me and I really thirsty to try these stuff with her and only her, should I try these things on this first time we have agreed to have this night or should I wait? If yes which is yes and which is no?

One last thing do you think there is any way that we can make it 2 time, one for her needs and another one for mine? Is it a good idea?

This is my first time to ask you for something and I am really waiting for your response and sorry for the long question

Tim Dorgan


Answer
I would start out lightly, bare handed for the spanking, taking time every now and then to keep Her aroused before continuing. Use a slow, steady rhythm, taking several seconds between blows.Increase the speed and power of the spanking until You reach a point where She says no harder. Remember, both of you are learning together, so be patient, and help each other by talking a lot about what feels better, and stick with that, until you learn more to adjust to each others needs.

As for the floggers, I would stick with the bare handed spankings until you can find someone who can teach floggers properly. This is not something I can teach you here. Used improperly, floggers, whips, canes and paddles can cause permanent damage to nerves, muscles, and more. It can leave a person disabled if done wrong, possibly for life.

As far as other play goes, I would take things slow, and enjoy each other as you explore your kink side. Remember, there is plenty of time for exploration, and this keeps you with things to try, so you do not get bored with things.

I hope this helps, and wish Y/you the best in Y/your Journey.



                                       SINcerely in Leather,
                                       Master Shadow.