Expert: Lady Aryana - 4/30/2008

Question
QUESTION: I have been looking into the D/s lifestyle. Your profile talks about being an expert at different "versions(?)". Could/would you explain at least the basics of them? Gorean, Old School, etc. I have tried to do this online and am getting more confused as I go. Basics, differences, appeals of each, you know...everything-lol.
Anything you can add will help. I am currently in the process of starting a library as well. You have several suggested books which I now have on order.
My husband is not the most interested (in fact he just shakes his head and kinda backs away when I start talking about this: Me as a "D"), so I'm on my own. ;)  But the more knowledge I have, maybe the better I can explain what I want.


ANSWER: Lady Mel,

I would love to be able to help you, although I hope that you can give me some time. I was in a serious accident a week ago, and just had 26 staples removed from my head. I am still taking pain meds every four hours *which according to the Dr's I shouldn't be in this much pain.

As for what the difference are about, its basically comes down to what you decide you are interested in. (Old Guard/ Old School) is argumentive for some now day. Alot of people will tell you that Old Guard never was a time period, Alot of these are not just the Gay community but the Hetro as well. Gorean is based on a Sci Fi books written by John Norman back in the sixty's which is based where Men are men, and women are slaves. Born, breed, and kidnapped from earth to become slaves for men. I am in a Gorean Relationship with my no Free Companion/Husband. I was his slave until not long ago, Although I agree that men should be MEN but I am also very down to earth *no pun lol* I know there are many women out there, that know a hell alot more about being in control then some men I know.

Victorian lifestyle is another area that is kinda hard to explain with a clean mind, which I am sorry to say I do not have one at the moment. If you wish, you can reask the question, and I will post it to the group here, and maybe someone can give you a quicker answer then I will be able to. Although give me a few more days, and hopefully I will be able to help you with this. Also, let me know which books are have on order, cause depending if your looking for REAL information, *not Sci Fi* I know alot of really good books, I suggest to alot of people. Also, although he is a Gay man, but putting this aside, he has some wonderful advice to offer not only to the Gay Community but to anyone at all. I suggest you sign up to get his new letters. Which I am sure you can get by looking on topica.com and then look for "LeatherViews." Written By Jack Rinella I also suggest ANY of his books. He is a wonderful person with alot of helpful advice for both new, and experienced people entering into the lifestyle.

In the mean time, I will get back with you as soon as I have a clearer mind.

Wishing you well

Lady Kayra


---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Thank you so much for taking the time and energy to answer as completely as you have. I look forward to any more information you can send on...after you've healed.
The books I have ordered (so far) are: Sex Tips from a Dominatrix by Payne, Patricia; Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns; The Master's Manual: A Handbook of Erotic Dominance; The Sexually Dominant Woman: A Workbook for Nervous Beginners; and  The Art Of Sensual Female Dominance: A Guide for Women. My list keeps growing :)


Answer
Greetings Lady Mel,

I am so sorry, I am still not doing well, but the list of books you have gotten so far are a wondering collection. I can only add a few more for you.

Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission by William Brame and Gloria Brame

Training With Miss Abernathy: A Workbook for Erotic Slaves and Their Owners by Christina Abernathy

Flogging: The Basics and Beyond (SMTech Educational) by Joseph W. Bean

Mistress Allure's Guide to Forbidden Eroticism for Adventurous Couples by Lawrence Elliot, Mistress Allure, and Her Consort Dimitri

The Compleat Slave: Creating And Living An Erotic Dominant/submissive Lifestyle by Jack Rinella and Joseph W. Bean

There is a Master's book to this one, called The Compleat Master I would suggest reading both.

As for Old Guard I would suggest this book.

To Love, to Obey, to Serve: Diary of an Old Guard Slave by V. M. Johnson

She's on Top: Erotic Stories of Female Dominance and Male Submission by Rachel Kramer Bussel

The New Topping Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy

Miss Abernathy's Concise Slave Training Manual by Christina Abernathy

Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission by William Brame and Gloria Brame

How to be Kinky: A Beginner's Guide to BDSM by Morpheous

SM 101: A Realistic Introduction by Jay Wiseman

The Loving Dominant by John Warren and Libby Warren

You have a good start, and these here will get you even better, the last two and Miss Abernathy's books are real good books, and will teach you alot, If you are looking to learn how to get into S&M from a Domme side, go to amazon.com and put in BDSM for books, there are a few books witch will teach you about CBT and others forms of play/pleasures.

As for the mind side of the relationship, the books you are getting, and the ones I have just suggested, are just what you are looking for.

I am still having problems, and am still needing meds every four hours. So please bare with me. I am just now able to sit at the puter for more then just a few minutes.

Good luck, and I hope this helps.

Lady Kayra