Expert: awhitecloud - 4/26/2008

Question
I am a newlywed and have always had fantasies about my husband tying me up and having complete control over everything I do to him. I have asked him on several different occasions if we could experiment with this and he always seems embarrassed when I ask. The only time he even remotely considers it is when he is EXTREMELY horny. I want to take our relationship to that level and really need to know what I need to do to make him comfortable enough to make me his sex slave. Please help!

Answer
Hello and thank you for the question.

I do not think you can make another person turn into something that they are not.  You can talk with them about it, buy books and read them print information from sites on line and allow the other person to grow and learn, and see if something becomes of it.

You might wish to join local munch groups in your area so that you can meet with like minded people and heave a place to grow and talk with others that are in the lifestyle.  Always remember that each and every relationship is different and just because some like something in theirs does not mean you have to use it or do it in yours.  That is the good thing about the lifestyle you pick what works in your relationship and leave the rest alone.

Here are some books that can get you started:

The Loving Dominant by John Warren

Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism by Philip Miller and Molly Devon

SM 101: A Realistic Introduction by Jay Wiseman

Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission by William Brame and Gloria Brame

Here is some web sites you might is to take a look at:

http://castlerealm.com/index.html

http://www.soulshaven.f2s.com/introduction.php3

This link might be a good one for both to look at and talk together.

http://www.ozabis.info/intro0.html

Thank you and I do not know if I have helped you or not but take it slow and talk open communication is the key first and foremost.

Thank you,

awhitecloud