Expert: arani_CsA - 9/29/2008

Question
My master wants to get another slave, and I'm extremely jealous and worried that she might take my place if she's just better than me you know? How do i get over this? Am i wrong for feeling this way? What do I do?

Answer
Hello...

Thank you for coming to me with your question.  I hope i can help you find the answers you are looking for.

First of all, you're not "wrong" for feeling this jealousy.  It's a very natural feeling, and one that many people can't get rid of.  Not everyone is meant for a poly relationship.  And if you're not, then it's better to recognize this early on, before anyone gets hurt.

You also need to remember that slaves DO have limits.  There are sometimes things that you simply can't do, no matter how much you might want to, either because of physical limitations or because of deep-set emotional or mental boundaries that are dangerous to even try to cross.  Part of learning to be a slave is learning what our boundaries are, and serving our Masters by informing them as to the nature of these boundaries.  It's more than just telling him that you don't want to do something; it's respectfully informing them that you just aren't able to do something.  For example, i have a bad heart -- there are simply some things that you don't do to a slave who has a bad heart.  In the same way, there are some things you don't expect of a slave who has some deep-seated emotional boundaries.

But, you also need to understand what happens in the mind of the Master who owns multiple slaves.  It's very possible for him to love each one of those slaves equally, and to cherish each and every one of them for the services she can provide him.  It's like having a child; you love each and every one of your children, and having a second child doesn't change the love you feel for the first.  

Try thinking of this as actually being a way for you to improve your service to your Master.  Often, in a household with multiple slaves, each one will have a particular role.  One may go out and work, and contribute to the financial good of the household.  Another may cook, or clean, or care for the children.  Speaking personally, i have several times begged my Master to take another slave.  By the time i get home from work, i am often just too exhausted to cook and keep the house as clean as i would like.  (Especially since i am physically handicapped.)  Fortunately, Master doesn't mind pitching in and cooking, or doing a load of laundry, from time to time.  But it would give me a great sense of relief to know that i could work over-time and be totally exhausted when i got home, and know that someone else had taken care of fixing dinner -- and know that Master didn't have to take that upon himself.  And, as far as cleaning the house goes -- i absolutely HATE housework.  How nice would it be to have someone else do it -- without having to pay a maid.

And there's another kind of service that Master and i have discussed having another slave provide for us.  In the next year or so, i am going to have to have some fairly major surgery.  It would certainly make Master feel better (and me, as well), if he could go to work and know that i was being looked after.

All of this said, not everyone can be part of a poly household.  And not everyone can be part of the SAME poly household.  Before your Master brings another slave into the house, the THREE of you need to sit down and figure out how this is going to work, or even IF it can work.  In the same way that you and your Master figured out that you and he are a good fit, you need to know that you and this other slave are a good fit.  Do your personalities click, and can you both bear it if you see your Master being affectionate with the other?  Can you enter into this relationship with the mind-set that both of you are serving your Master better?

To know these things, you need to spend a lot of time talking to your Master and discussing all of these things.  Let him know that you need reassurance that he will still love and cherish you, perhaps even more by knowing that you're willing to share the responsibility of serving him.  And make sure that he's not just taking another slave because it's his right.  He needs to think this through as well.

Good luck to you, and if you have any further questions feel free to bring them to me.

arani_CsA,
devoted propety of Clampius_Arelius