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BDSM/Wife wants to explore with another man...

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Limbo_SA wrote at 2010-02-03 11:47:37
I have too recently discovered that my wife is involved in D/s (or is M/s) relationship with another man online



We have discussed the topic but always seem to skirt around the fact that she has a master. I know that she does but she denies it. That is pretty hurtful, makes me feel like she doesn't love me anymore and is "cheating" on me with another man and hence is hiding



I must however admit that I have been reading up on the topic and am slightly more enlightened. It does seem that your wife (or mine) can be interested in the whole lifestyle but still love you very much. She just doesn't see you in that light. The lifestyle is filling a need that she has which you cannot satisfy



Be glad that she has at least openly admitted her desires to you and not "gone behind your back" as in my case. I understand that she may feel ashamed and this is why she keeps it secret but if you are to have a successful marriage then you need to be open with each other



I myself have told my wife that I am not comfortable with it and don't want her to have one. Yes this is due to my insecurity and jealousy. I feel bad in that she might now reject me and continue with the relationship anyway and that scares me in not knowing what future we have together



A part of me wants to tell her to continue with it (which she is probably doing anyway) to fill the need she has and for me to not interfere. This is hard though for me as i am an hurting inside and feel like she no longer loves me and I am worried that I will loose her even though she has assured me that she loves me



This is a very tough and sensitive topic. Sorry to have hi-jacked your post, just wanted to give you someone who is also going through the same things perspective. Because I know I would like to hear from others going through the same thing


Cass wrote at 2010-09-22 14:52:03
Hi,

I guess I'm on the other side of the fence on this one. I to was aposed to my buddy and my wife trying this. Aginst my better judgement I said "ok" just once. Things changed when after a week passed my buddy took me to his place , telling me he had a surprise that he wanted me to see. I think you can guess the rest. Now I'm "hooked" on watching my wife let herself be used in ways I'd never have believed possible. Let her do it with him alone once , Then insist on watching from a chair in the corner. I think you may change your mind. I sure did.


new sub and loving it wrote at 2012-11-25 00:24:43
Hi there

As a women who is in the same shoes as your wife maybe i can help  a bit.... I know my husband can not do what the Dom i have found can do he can do the spanking and has tried a couple of other things but to dominate me the way i want it will be to hard for him, as long as your wife is coming home to you every time she sees  who ever it is she finds and she is willing to share with you what has happened and she still loves and wants you to make love to her i am sorry but is that not the main thing... if you think you can do what this guy is going to be doing tell her and do it otherwise please let her try this, as long as you set ground rules like condoms is a must no knowing where you guys live she tells you where she will be and contacts you after say 2 or 3 hrs if not you call the police, i would tell her to take her time get to know the guy ask him tons of questions about what sort of things he does for punishments ect... make sure the two of you work on a list of hard limits ( things she will not do ) you may find if you can handle this and it will take time that it is an amazing experience for the two of you as she will learn things she can pass on to your sex life, ... i do wish you both all the luck in the world, and hope things work out for the two of you....


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I am available to answer questions pertaining to the Master slave dynamic. The slaves journey into submission, mentorship, service,leather lifestyle, household management, and training. My life's focus is assisting individuals to realized their fullest potential through self awareness.

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I am a 51 year old female slave who has been part of the BDSM/M/s lifestyle since 1983. I have had the distinct privilege of sharing my perspective on the M/s dynamic throughout the US and Canada. I am the owner and producer of ABR Events an authority based relationship organization that provides quality education concerning power dynamic relationships of all kinds, including that of M/s. It is also a honor and privilege to be owned property for the past 13 years. I bring to the table no only my concepts on mastery and slavery but also real time experience.

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TES MAST ROCHESTER NY (Director) MAsT national ABR Events ( Owner/producer)

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Slave quarters: "The mind body spirit of consensual slavery" Art of slavery Tryscilian society

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Aside from learning from lifes experiences i have a BA in psychology and a masters in socialogy. i have studied gender and human sexuality in an ever changing world.

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Southeast slave 2006 International slave 2006

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Masters and slaves

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