Expert: Mistress Violette - 4/24/2009

Question
Hi Mistress Violette, my wife is a dominant woman and she asked me to worship her but i don't know how to worship a woman. Please tell me how can i worship my wife because if i won't worship her she will divorce me and i can't live without her. Help me Mstresse Violette i'm begging you.

Answer
Hello, Gilbert,

It looks like the two of you are new to BDSM, so I want to welcome you to what can be a wonderful experience. You're starting out the right way, too, learning before doing. I think one of the most important things to learn is there's no one right way to do BDSM. That means some dominants want to be worshipped, others don't. For those who do, what worship involves is an individual thing. If your wife has said she wants you to worship her it's fine for you to ask her what that entails. After all, it's a dominant's responsibility to communicate her expectations to her submissive.

I'm a bit concerned about you thinking your wife will divorce you if you don't worship her properly. Please be sure your marriage is on firm footing before venturing into BDSM. Also, you and your wife may want to visit some discussion sites for BDSM people, to get an idea of how others work it into their marriages. Threats to end the relationship aren't good in any type of relationship, BDSM or otherwise. We say good BDSM is safe, sane and consensual. Threats really aren't any of those things.

It might be a good idea for you and your wife to learn more about BDSM together. Here are some sites you both might find helpful:
http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/dictionary/Power_exchange/
http://www.xeromag.com/fvbdsm.html
http://sexuality.org/ (search for BDSM and related terms)
http://www.domsubfriends.com/library/artofsm.shtml
http://www.leathernroses.com/lnrhome.htm
http://www.leatherviews.com/

Good luck and have fun!

Mistress Violette