AboutOscar G. Expertise From simple curiosity to elaborate scene set up and planning as well as technique, gear, link, advice, opinion, facts and reference among other colleagues.
Social, spiritual, romantic and emotional issues related to BDSM
Bondage being my focus and specialty, but love the sensual aspects of these arts.
Experience 15 years researching, reading, interacting, dating and playing in the BDSM lifestyle actively as a Dom, used to be sub.
BDSM, Bondage, gags, blindfolds, knots, ropes, restrains and roleplaying
Organizations belong to Assorted loose organizations in Southern CA
Publications N/A
Education/Credentials Engineering & Military
Awards and Honors Military and respect from my peers in the BDSM community
Question I'm a sub married male, whose wife is not interested in it, and I'm getting together with a good friend of mine who just happens to also be a sub male. The problem is, he has asked me to top him while we're together, but I've never been a top.
I was hoping to get some advice on how to do this.
Answer Hi Ian:
Best option if to talk it out. Communicate. See what each like, and have in common. See the activities each like to do on other or done to you or him. You may be impressed with what you learn. There may be some good middle ground where you could agree to experiment upon. Specially with the stuff that gets you going. The main thing is to go slow once you are doing something and always be safe.
But first and foremost talk and share ideas and fantasies. And figure what you could do according to roles and preferences. You may not be much into being Top, but you never now. There could be something you could try that has not done to you that you wish to experiment. But as i said talk it over with partner and find out limits (how far/how much on each activity).
I would say go with fantasies and see what can be done for real, as long as you both agree and you both keep safe. I hope it helps.
Be well and be safe.
Oscar G.
