Expert: Lady Aryana - 8/4/2009

Question
I'm new to this and was needing all the help I can get on punishments and any thing else I need to know to try and be a good master it seems very interesting and I'm truly curious what I need to do what to expect stuff like that anything will help

Answer
Hello Mark,

Punishments can come in many forms, although they need to be what ever you feel comfortable with.. Corner time, essays, writing lines, mouth washing, lectures, spankings, groundings, loss of rights *computer time, credit cards, phone time, cell phone, going out with friends, ect* Not being allowed to wear pants if they get to, not allowed to wear panties, being forbid to cum, being made to masturbate but not being allowed to release. The list is endless..

You simply need to figure out what works for you, and what works for your submissive, and go from there. Punishments are things that the submissive does not enjoy, and will work to avoid having repeated again.

Example.. Say your submissive enjoys a hand spanking, but does not enjoy a switch... Well as a punishment you could send her out to get a switch and she would know she was do be punished, cause for her, a switch means punishment... If she enjoys a leather paddle, and you sent her to get that, she would know she wasn't in trouble cause she enjoys it... If she doesn't enjoy a bath brush, but saw one on the couch when she walked in the room, she would again know she had done something wrong.

Being sent to the corner is another way for a submissive to know they are being punished, as they are able to think about what they have done, why they are there, and what is about to happen... Reflect on their actions which in the long run makes the punishment worse then no corner time at all.

You can expect that your submissive will test you, push you to see how much she can get away with, and see if you will actually punish her at all... If you do not, it will cause more problems, and to her be a disappointment. And a disappointment for you as well. Submissive want accountability in a power exchange relationship. Even if they try as hard as they can to behave, they will never be perfect and when they do make a mistake no matter how big or small, they wish to be called on it. It doesn't mean they need to be beaten, it can be a small punishment, just something that shows them you care enough that you noticed and care enough for them to do something to help them be the submissive you want them to be.

If you would like, send me your email, and I will send you some more information/files on punishments *there is a Character limit here* Although in the mean time, here is some information/links on punishments for you

http://www.domsub.info/punishmentideas.shtml

http://www.leathernroses.com/generalbdsm/drgnlordpunish.htm

http://www.leathernroses.com/generalbdsm/yieldingpunishment.htm

http://www.leathernroses.com/generalbdsm/ravenpunishment.htm

http://www.thespankingblog.com/index.php/weblog/bondage_bdsm_and_judicial_punish...


Good luck in your journey and I wish you many years of happiness

Lady Aryana