Expert: ziggy ziegler - 9/17/2009

Question
This may sound odd, but how do I train my husband to be okay with owning me?  I have a very strong need to belong and I want us to have a d/s relationship...maybe eventually a m/s one.  But his mom makes all the decisions in her house, so growing up he was taught that respecting a wife means never asserting authority.  We've talked about a d/s relationship before, and I've explained my needs to him.  He seems interested, and sometimes he tries it, but I can tell that he just has no idea how to assert authority without just slapping me around.  I'm not sure how to train him, especially if I'm the submissive one.  What should I do?  (We also have two young children.  Just thought that might help with an answer)

Answer
Lindsey

Believe it or not i get this question a lot from potential slaves. How do i train my boy friend or husband to be my master?

I know i am supposed say well start by this and then do that but really you can't train them to be your Master. If its just not something they care to do and learn for themselves you may end up with a non consensual relationship at best and at worst you will be disappointed and maybe even damage what you currently have.

Might i recommend talking with him and taking it slow.. get out and get involved in a local Masters and slaves group  (MasT) Perhaps with the chance to talk with other masters and slaves it will help him process what it means to be a master... Its possible that your hubby can be a master but rest assured he will develop his own style of mastery and it may not be what you envisioned.... Like my owner says be careful what you ask for smiles..

None the less, i whish  you the best of luck

warmest regards
slave ziggy