Expert: Oscar G. - 9/27/2009

Question
I had bookmarked a website someone had given me describing the different types of masters.  There were 3 types listed.  I cannot find the bookmark, I may have accidentally deleted it  Can you please explain the 3 types to me.  I remember 2, not the names they were given but the type they were. Very Strict and controlling with a very strong hand and the other was one that was fair but firm,where the submissive was controlled with a gentle hand and with love.  If i remember right the later was given a name that started with an A.  I will be looking for a new master soon and need to know how to describe the type i want when it comes time and with the correct names and descriptions i can make the correct choice.  Thank you so much for you time.

Answer
Dear Elizabeth:

I may not be of much help with you having the proper right name and type of the Doms you describe or need. Each writer and author creates their own theories and definition and terms in some topics that may be a bit subjective.
While i do believe certain type of dominants could be grouped into certain groups, I really think 3 is a bit limited and i think each scholar may make 3 different names for each of those groups (if not more).

My point here would be, YOU define what you want. It is good to learn and read about BDSM, but it only ends up being a reference point to contrast with your wants and needs. Each person is different and many may not even fit neatly into those categories (or any for that matter). No one is going to quiz you and give a pass/fail grade for not knowing those names. But you will be respected and admired for being defined about yourself and your self knowledge.

Best wishes to you. Be well, be safe and have fun.

Oscar G.