Expert: Master Shadow - 12/2/2010

Question
I have read a lot of books, mostly fiction, about the life
style and it has always turned me on and excited me, but I
don't know how to really get into it.  I know that I am
submissive and would love to explore the some, but how do I
find someone trust worthy?  I know that there are bad Dom's
out there, I don't want to get myself into that kind of
situation, plus there is the fact that I know I don't do
casual sex.  How do I get into something and find the right
person for the job, without getting seriously hurt?

Answer
First off, try local munches or sloshes, although I personally prefer munches, as I don't like alcohol mixed in with my whips and chains, so to speak. The easiest way to locate these is through the local internet. Try typing bdsm along with your city and state, or just your city to locate others who hold munches in your area.

As far as trustworthy, always, and I do mean always use a safe call* and meet in a public place BEFORE playing with the prospective Dom or Domme. I usually try to play or scene at a local dungeon, where there are others around. It keeps things nice and safe until you get to know the person more enough to trust them. Also, ask others about the Dom in question. See if any others know Him/Her, and if so, what can they tell you about the person.

I would also ask questions at the munches, find out more about what and who is available in your group. I would also check out Gloria-Brame.com for info, and interesting reading on the subject.


*Safe Call: A call made to you by a friend while you are with the prospective Dom/Domme to be sure you are safe. Make sure the caller is NEAR your location, and not all the way across town. Give them as much info as you can as to where you are meeting this Dom/Domme, what they look like, their license number, address, full name, and description of not only their car but of the Dom/Domme themselves if possible. Put it this way, the info you provide may save your butt if something DOES go wrong.

Make sure you have a safe question, as well as safe  phrase, such as "What are you doing?", answer,  "We're just sitting here watching the game." or some such to let your safe caller know you need help, and quick, and to call the police with the info immediately! Remember, ONLY use the safe phrase if you need help.


Hope this helps!



                                            Sincerely in Leather,
                                            Master Shadow.