Expert: awhitecloud - 3/15/2010

Question
Not sure how to approach this question , but here goes.My wife and I have been married for 9 tears in June 2010.We have great a sexual relationship together.We have tried everything just about under the sun.My wife has found a Dom male(married)outside of our marriage.She is going about it very,very slow and yes She tells me everything of what goes on.They have not meet yet but email and chat online.Can not find info at all on this kind of situation anywhere.HELP (the husband)

Answer
well, I am not sure what help you need.  I know of a lot of people that do just what your suggesting. It can work as long as you have open and honest communication with all members.  Some people would call it partly being Poly.  You did not say if they would meet up or anything so I am not totally sure what the question is other then to get more information on the lifestyle.

Polyamory

The defining characteristic of polyamory is belief in the possibility of, and value of, multiple romantic loving relationships carried out "with the knowledge and consent of all partners concerned."[3]  What distinguishes polyamory from traditional forms of non-monogamy (i.e. "cheating") is an ideology that openness, goodwill, intense communication, and ethical behavior should prevail among all the parties involved. Powerful intimate bonding among three or more persons may occur. Some consider polyamory to be, at its root, the generalization  of romantic couple-love beyond two people into something larger and more fundamental.[4]

People who identify as polyamorous typically reject the view that sexual and relational exclusivity are necessary for deep, committed long-term loving relationships. Those who are open to, or emotionally suited for, a polyamorous lifestyle may be single or in monogamous relationships, but are often involved in multiple long term relationships such as a triad, quad, or intimate network.

In practice, polyamorous relationships are highly varied and individualized. Ideally they are built upon values of trust, loyalty, negotiation, and compersion, as well as rejection of jealousy, possessiveness, and restrictive cultural standards.[5] Such relationships are often more fluid than the traditional "dating-and-marriage" model of long-term relationships, and the participants in a polyamorous relationship may not have preconceptions as to its duration.

Sex is not necessarily a primary focus in polyamorous relationships. Polyamorous relationships commonly consist of groups of more than two people seeking to build a long-term future together on mutually agreeable grounds, with sex as only one aspect of their relationship.

I hope this helps some if there is anything else I can do please write back.

Thank you

awhitecloud