Expert: Oscar G. - 8/24/2010

Question
I enjoy being dominated, and I'm trying to find a compromise that doesn't interfere with my fiance's morals. He feels that any form of bondage is perverted and refuses to hurt me for any reason. I enjoy light pain, and I have difficulty achieving orgasm if I am not tied or held down. Can you think of any compromise that would allow both of us to enjoy our sexual activities?

Answer
Dear Janet:

The issue here it is him and his mind. The only way I can suggest different ideas or point of view is to make him notice that everything between 2 willing adults is valid and it is a playful consenting game played for mutual enjoyment.
You could argue that it is not pain you seek, but strong simulations. And Bondage is not painful per se anyway, is it?. It is merely restrain and fettering. It allows for slow burning of passions and to build up excitement in a playful manner.

What is more moral than giving your beloved partner pleasure? It is ethical, balanced and reasonable. He may not quite be  into it, but for whatever he is willing to give you, tell him you should be able to give him something back in return to him for his effort. He may get into it once he figures he could obtain almost anything from you this way <wink>.
If he is not willing to compromise and see B&D play is not perverted per se (but the mind that makes it so) then the help you may need goes beyond what i can offer here or is more of the professional kind.
I wish you the best of luck in your exploration.
Be well, be safe and have fun.
Oscar G.