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BDSM/Some what new M/s relationship

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I had just told my boyfriend a few months ago about this lifestyle , he is adjusting pretty well to this...I'm just a few years older than him and I am a submissive. I have read a lot on bdsm since I was 17....now 21 but not much of the Dominate side of it so it's kind of hard to help him into the lifestyle...he is more then willing to learn and has done good so far...to be honest I never had real life training before, just online...my question is what can help him in the training process. I am also having issues communicating openly with him about things with M/s, he is brand new to this and I have never openly admitted to wanting this lifestyle in my life ever before.

Answer
Jessica,

I would suggest you and your boyfriend sign up for fetlife.com and find others in your area whom can give you information on what is safe and sane.. As for your training, this is as simple as what he would like to have you do.

I would suggest you buy this the following books

The Compleat Slave: Creating And Living An Erotic Dominant/submissive Lifestyle  by Jack Rinella and Joseph W. Bean

Screw the roses, send me the thorns

SM 101: A Realistic Introduction by Jay Wiseman

Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission

The Master's Manual: A Handbook of Erotic Dominance

Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission by William Brame and Gloria Brame

Of course all these books will also give you information about what it is when it comes to the lifestyle you seem to be so attracted to.

When it comes to your communicating to him I would suggest you and him talk about a journal and you being allowed to talk *freely* in it.. You will not get into trouble for what you write which means you express yourself completely. Just remember you are not writing there in order to tear him down but to show him what you are worried about, what scares you and what turns you on as well.

While you are learning about the lifestyle being on fetlife will also allow you both to find a mentor in your area. You can attend classes, demo's and munches which will again show you both what the community has to offer and what it is you can learn and share later..

Good luck and I wish you both happiness.

Lady Aryana

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Lady Aryana

Expertise

Fem Dom relationships, Male Dom/fem slave, Master/slave relationships M/f, F/f, Long Distance relationships, Leather community, Victorian Lifestyle, BDSM play, Community support, Full time slavery and submission *living together, and how to adjust, protocols, and so forth. Web pages and site for help with finding others in your area. HOH or DD relationships. D/s has always been a part of me I am still active in looking for a relationship either D/s or Mistress/slave, or simply learning more in order to help others. I am always reading, either on the net or books.

Experience

I have been in long distance relationship that were D/s relationships. I have owned both male and female slaves/submissive, I have been both a real time slave, submissive, and submissive wife. I am not in a committed relationship at the moment. I just moved to Indina with in the last year. I can be found on Fetlife.com as LadyAryana. I am not collared, and I still am always on the look for others to play with around me. Slowing I am returning to being active in the community here in Indiana. In the past I have been active in the BDSM community and a DM for play parties. I have been active for the last 20+ yrs in BDSM in one way or another

Organizations
I was active in the GA community when I lived there. I am semi active in Indiana since moving here, I attend munches and demo's / play parties GRALE, Belong to PEP, and other BDSM clubs over the yrs.

Publications
Egroups, Blogs, Journals, And some story writings.

Education/Credentials
Have taken work shops for different BDSM events. Attended SELF given demo's, Been a DM for play parties and private and public clubs. Attending gathering of both D/s, Spanking lifestyles. I have been active in HOH and DD relationships. I was active in the leather community while living in GA. I was trained Victorian and and Gorean, I understand that training varies in each relationship so you adjust to what it is you do for the relationship you are in. I have trained both Master's and Mistress' along with slaves in the yrs I have been in BDSM.

Past/Present Clients
Master, slave, submissive, Tops, and Bottoms. Along with those who simply wanted to learn how to be kinky in the bedroom

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