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BDSM/SM relationship psychology

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Question
Hello,

I have a specific question about the psychology of a sadistic person and SM relationships. There is this couple, the man is a sadist, not very cruel, but mental. He uses mental sadism with the girl by humiliating, controlling and restraining her. But the thing is that she is actually a masochist, but is afraid to tell that to him. She likes being treated that way, but acts contrariwise. And even though she likes him, she is really angry, because she sees that he is being cruel to her, I mean, HE thinks she's a standard person and still treats her badly just to get his satisfaction. She hates it that he never discussed his sadism with her and acts just as he wants to. She is thinking about breaking up with him, but the thing is, she wants to tell him that she's a masochist, she wants to humiliate HIM, show him that none of his mental tortures actually had an impact on her, that she was never really suffering, that HE was the one that has been cheated on. She believes this gonna be some kind of revenge. Now, I'm not gonna interfere, but I am wondering if this will make him angry and feel humiliation? Usually sadist and masochists make a perfect match, but at this point, can her plan work? Will he feel the way she is expecting? Could that happen? It's about the sadist's psychology.
Hope you didn't get bored reading all this, but it would be so great if you could help me with this psychological issue.
Thank you very very much,

Kristina

Answer
Hi Kristina,

That is way too complex to answer by guessing and estimating. Without knowing people a lot better I can't approach a problem complex as this. Sorry. I hope they find ways to communicate and to understand themselves in order to shed light on their situation and lead to lasting happiness.

Khaos

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Khaos

Expertise

I can answer questions about techniques in BDSM, especially about bondage. I also have plenty of experience in the psychological aspects of it, dominance, mind control techniques, and erotic hypnosis.

Experience

About 14 years experience as a bondage Dom, kinkster, and swinger.

Publications
I write often for http://KhaosTheory.com and published a book about lifestyle design and sexual dominance.

Education/Credentials
I have been studying psychology, neurosciences, and the applied arts of BDSM for these 14 years I have been in it. Most of it is of very practical application and tested in the field. There are no diplomas on the wall, but consequently I am not bound by the limits and constraints of any medical or educational occupation.

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