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QUESTION: Hello Lady Aryana,

I have a very strange question for you today. I really wish to worship this woman like a real Goddess (I truly do). Because that is what she really is to me. She is of the same age group as me, is extremely beautiful, and very intelligent too (far more then any ordinary woman out there).

Officially (legally), she will soon be my wife. And to my positive astonishment, I've discovered that she does secretly desire to be sexually dominant also. However I have felt that she is a bit shy to say it to me openly. And this is because she is physically disabled (in a wheelchair, with challenging motor skills, due to an accident in childhood). Had this not been the case, then I am sure she would have right now been a real dominatrix.

So this is my challenge Lady Aryana, to worship her unconditionally, for all time, without making her feel as though I am doing it only to make her feel good about herself. I mean, I will feel extreme pride if she orders me to worship her feet from morning to night (and then from night to morning). But her problem is that she herself does not believe that she can fit the role of a true Goddess.

I am physically very strong, while she is not, which is why (in her own mind) she doesn't believe that she can have me under her full control. That's why she just wouldn't let out her dominant side with me. If I start worshiping her (which is what I really do desire), then I am afraid she would feel as if I am doing it like a charitable act towards her.

So this is my question to you, how can a physically disabled lady dominate a strongly built man? I know she secretly wants to, and too desire worshiping her endlessly. But how can I assist her to come out in the open? How can I make her break her own mental block? How should I go about to make her realize that is truly worthy of endless worship?

Any advice from you would be greatly appreciated. Thanks. :)

ANSWER: S,

Sorry I was out of town Monday night, and last night, and only returned today. Although I got your msg, I had no way to answer it until now.

Now as for the desires you have to worship this women, you need to sit down with her, and talk to her, explain what it is you want to do and why. Remind her this isn't cause she is handicapped it cause you want to do these things. Keep reminding her and keep doing the things you want to do, and when she asked you to do something, don't question her, or put it off until you think you can do it, this way she can see you want to be of service to her when she wants it.

I am bi polar, and have back issues, although like your lady, I tend not to let others help me when I am in pain, cause I don't want to be considered handicapped. Although I know deep down, its not charity its the whole they wish to make things easier for me while I get things done.

I am not sure where you live, or if you have a fetlife account, although if you do not have a account I would suggest you sign up for one. It is free, and you both can sign up, her as a Domme, and you as her submissive/husband *BTW Congrats on getting married.* Once you are signed up, I would suggest you or you both sign up with this group.

https://fetlife.com/groups/4966

Handicapped and in the Lifestyle

Until she is ready to see you as a submissive, and herself as the Mistress it will be hard for you, as again I am not sure of the age here, but she was always having to learn to deal with things on her own her whole life.

Although I would suggest you get her the following books.

The Mistress Manual: The Good Girl's Guide to Female Dominance

The Art Of Sensual Female Dominance: A Guide for Women

Both books will help her get past her thoughts of you are doing these things cause you see it as charity but cause you wish to worship her. This may take time, but the more she gets to know about the lifestyle the better off you both will be in the long run.

I also suggest you attend munches or demo's in the area in which you live.  She will see that there are others with disabilities out there, although they do not let it interfere in the lifestyle. She needs to see that what you are doing it normal for a Mistress and submissive and how it will help you both in the long run.

Good Luck, and again I am sorry it took me so long to get back with you.

Lady Aryana

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Thanks Lady Aryana for taking the time to answer my question. Although you did not offer a quick fix to my issue, but I actually wasn't expecting one either. As I myself know that this sure is a complicated matter. So had you actually offered a quick fix to me, then I'd have though that you did not take the time to fully understand this issue. But fortunately you did, and also answered intelligently. So this I really do appreciate a lot!  :)

I guess all that is now left to do, is to make her believe that she really is worthy of endless worship. I honestly wouldn't have taken her as a life partner, or agreed to shared all my wealth with, and let her become the one through whom my family name would one day be carried forward. I really wouldn't have done any of this, had she not been worth it.

I actually do seriously believe that the only reason why I was created, was so that she would have someone serving her for all time. Because she really is worth it I swear, in every way imaginable! And no, this is not my hormones which are doing the talking, I actually do feel all of this for real. She is also my equal, not just when it comes to being of the same age group, but on many different levels too. She often often surprises me with her intelligence, by giving a great idea when I am stuck in a situation. So what I wouldn't have thought of otherwise, she instantly suggests it to me. So there really is no question that she is very smart! And I also consider myself to be extremely lucky to have her around!

I seriously am not interested in anyone else, never will be, (no matter how sexually dominant a woman can become towards me). As compared to her natural beauty, as well as the grace by which she carries herself in public. Is something I doubt any other woman would be able to match.... And what's even more amazing is that she's also got a very smart mouth. So when push comes to shove, she can easily put someone in his or her proper place also. Which is why, I say it openly, that she really is worthy of nonstop worship!

OK, so now comes my follow up question to you, which is: Should I now show her this thread? Is it a good idea? I am sure that she would be surprised (at the very least). I also know that she is without question a secretly dominant yet also a very thoughtful, sweet, and compassionate lady (which is something extremely rare among all the well educated ladies in their 30s).

I just hope that she now doesn't become power mad after reading this, and blows away all my hard earned wealth (which took a lifetime for me to acquire).  :D

Anyway, what do you now suggest to her, as she reads this whole thread?  :)

Answer
S

Yes you should allow her to read this, cause it will not only show her what it is you want, it will also allow her to understand *I hope* that serve isn't about being able to or willing to, its about the need and desire. Hopefully once she reads this she will understand what you want to do for her, and allow her to allow you to help her when she needs/wants it.

One other thing, relationships in general are based on trust. And if you show her this, you trust her enough to be completely open with yourself, and allow her into your most inner thoughts.

Good Luck, and keep me posted :)

Lady Aryana

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Lady Aryana

Expertise

Fem Dom relationships, Male Dom/fem slave, Master/slave relationships M/f, F/f, Long Distance relationships, Leather community, Victorian Lifestyle, BDSM play, Community support, Full time slavery and submission *living together, and how to adjust, protocols, and so forth. Web pages and site for help with finding others in your area. HOH or DD relationships. D/s has always been a part of me I am still active in looking for a relationship either D/s or Mistress/slave, or simply learning more in order to help others. I am always reading, either on the net or books.

Experience

I have been in long distance relationship that were D/s relationships. I have owned both male and female slaves/submissive, I have been both a real time slave, submissive, and submissive wife. I am not in a committed relationship at the moment. I just moved to Indina with in the last year. I can be found on Fetlife.com as LadyAryana. I am not collared, and I still am always on the look for others to play with around me. Slowing I am returning to being active in the community here in Indiana. In the past I have been active in the BDSM community and a DM for play parties. I have been active for the last 20+ yrs in BDSM in one way or another

Organizations
I was active in the GA community when I lived there. I am semi active in Indiana since moving here, I attend munches and demo's / play parties GRALE, Belong to PEP, and other BDSM clubs over the yrs.

Publications
Egroups, Blogs, Journals, And some story writings.

Education/Credentials
Have taken work shops for different BDSM events. Attended SELF given demo's, Been a DM for play parties and private and public clubs. Attending gathering of both D/s, Spanking lifestyles. I have been active in HOH and DD relationships. I was active in the leather community while living in GA. I was trained Victorian and and Gorean, I understand that training varies in each relationship so you adjust to what it is you do for the relationship you are in. I have trained both Master's and Mistress' along with slaves in the yrs I have been in BDSM.

Past/Present Clients
Master, slave, submissive, Tops, and Bottoms. Along with those who simply wanted to learn how to be kinky in the bedroom

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