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Question
I'm 27 year old wife and mother of 10 years. D/s part has always held my attention as I am a very submissive person. I have researched it more and more and want to attempt this style of a realationship. My sex life with my husband has always been pretty "vanilla". Mostly, I believe because I grew up very sheltered and my hubby is afraid of freaking me out. To try and help loosen him up I had him do a "limits contract" to try and get him to understand I'm more open than he thinks. He seems stuck in the frame of mind that being a dim is all about his own satisfaction and pleasure.... I don't know how to explain that isn't how it works. He "hates to read" so getting him to do the research is impossible.
I guess my question is: Is it possible this late in the game to even start this? And is his "lack of u defeat ding" just a road block or likely something he can't get over?

Answer
Do you know that not all D/s is sexual?  And he might just fear hurting you, or that he is unsure of how far to take things as well which direction to head into?

Maybe look in your local area for some munches and get to know others in your area. This way you have some like minded friends to learn from as well to asK questions of and to help lead you.

You can join www.fetlife.com and it is free, then seearch different groups where you can learn more. Spending some time together on the site might help you both to talk and see which direction you should head into. You can find activties in your area and talk with others in that area.

I thank you for your question, and I wish you well on your journey. If you have other question please come and ask them, I will try to answer best that I can. I wish you well.

Awhitecloud

BDSM

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awhitecloud

Expertise

Life questions in the area of D/s and real life relationships. I have been active in the Lifestyle for over 18 years and live it real time. Active in local munches for the last 16 years. Have practical life experiences that have brought me to a greater understanding of my self and the lifestyle. There is some part or aspect of the lifestyle in each part of my day. I am constantly thinking about something in the lifestyle. There is no part of my day that is not centered around the D/s lifestyle.

Experience

I have been active in the community for over 19 years. I have been helping people for the last 14 years on a number of boards. And I write articles for different on line as well other D/s publications. Have a published book and am now working on the second one. Helping other as well promoting the lifestyle in a healthy, safe way is what I want to keep trying to do.

Organizations
Spokane Power Exchange. Salem OR area...Wet Spot

Publications
D/s World .... Fbot..."The Subbie Journal" www.Fetlife.com

Education/Credentials
I have finished my Master's degree and have spent a great deal of time in the fields of physiology. And I did a D/s study for my Master's thesis, and I was surprised with the out come. D/s views may not be defined but most all relationships have some aspect of them. Have a D/s book "The subbie Journal? in it's third printing.

Awards and Honors
I have several for best article of the month from D/s World.

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