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BDSM/Sub/Slave transfer from a training Mistress

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Question
Hello Ben,
I have been communication with a sub/slave that has been in training and living with a Mistress in Oklahoma. The sub lady seems very real and wants to move in with me as her master. The Mistress has requested a 250.00 payment to hold this specific sub for me and another 250.00 when I pick her up, she says this is standard practice in the BDSM community for her training.
Is this correct?
Thank you,
Daniel

Answer
Daniel -

Before answering your question, ask yourself the following questions:

1. Do you want to have someone move in with you, and be responsible for them, when you've never met in person?
2. If the person wants to serve you, why is there a third party standing in between that decision?
3. What is the purpose of the payment, since sale of a person isn't legal?

Now to answer your question: no, this isn't common or standard. Rather, it is a ruse and a scam.

An M/s relationship is a relationship that happens to have a hierarchical structure. It is entered into because both parties consensual believe there is a fit and will benefit (non-financially) from it.

The idea is paying a fee to a slave trainer has roots in M/s erotic fiction. But it is just that: fiction.  

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Ben Martin

Expertise

Questions related to power-based relationships in which decision-making authority is intentionally and consensually transferred -- and the resulting imbalance celebrated. I am able to assist those trying to understand where they fit in, and those seeking to structure and thrive in a power based relationships. Specific topics I am able to discuss include: setting and achieving personal and relationship goals, responsible Mastery, the use of protocols and rituals, communication techniques, and conflict resolution. In addition, I am knowledgable and experienced in polyamory, long-distance relationships, bisexuality and a variety of kinky activities ranging from mind games to sadistic play.

Experience

I have chosen to have a power-based structure in my relationships over the past 18 years. This has included a 16-year M/s relationship, several shorter term D/s relationships and various play partners. I am an active participant in various online forums and seek to provide support and advice to those interested in the Lifestyle.

Organizations
Black Rose

Publications
My writings, insights and discussion contributions are available on Alt.com and FetLife.com. On both websites, my user name is BenMartin

Education/Credentials
I do not hold any credentials specific to BDSM, relying instead on knowledge gained from life experiences, reading and conversing with others in the Lifestyle.

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