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Question
Hi there iv recently been asked to to be a sub for my master, he wants me to go watch a session but he wont do the session it will be someone else. I asked can he not train me since he wants me for his own, he said no as he prefers subs who are trained.
I know this will sound daft but is he even a master ? He doesn't seem at all wanting to train me or even meet in person.

Answer
Hmmmm.  I'd start by asking him if he is on www.Fetlife.com  If not, I'd begin to be concerned because that would mean that he's probably not part of the "public scene" and anything he says/does he's likely to be making up.  

If he is on Fetlife, then how many friends?  Below 50 = new account or, if over a year old, he's not sociable or liked or something.

You might ask him what books he has read about Master/slave issues.

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Now, directly to your point: Masters train their own slaves. It's part of the bonding experience. You get to see how good he is at reading your responses to training situations, he gets to test your skills and quickness to learn.

Also, they way someone else does something may or may not be relevant to what HE wants, so now you'll have the added burden of unlearning what you just were taught.

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What makes him think he's a "master?"  Been successful in his work life: managed people? Has great personal control?  Why does he want YOU? What is his reason for wanting a slave?

Why do you want HIM? What is your reason for wanting to turn authority over yourself to another person?

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If you, yourself, are not on Fetlife, I'd suggest you join. It's free.  If you do, please send me a "friend request."  I'm Dr_Bob

You'll find lots of groups on there for Masters and slaves.  Great way to check someone out ahead of time.

All the best,

Bob

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Robert Rubel (Dr. Bob)

Expertise

Anything related to BDSM or Master/slave relationships or activities.

Experience

See: www.KinkMastery.com I live 24/7 Master/slave lifestyle and have since 2002 both as Master and slave. My Owner and I present and do "weekend intensives" internationally and at BDSM conferences practically every month.

Organizations
Masters And slaves Together (MAsT) National Leather Association - International (NLA-I) National Coalition for Sexual Freedom (NCSF)

Publications
+++ BDSM Mastery—Basics: your guide to play, parties, and scene protocols. +++ BDSM Mastery—Relationships: a guide for creating mindful relationships for Dominants and submissives +++ Master/slave Mastery: Updated handbook of concepts, approaches, and practices +++ Master/slave Mastery--Advanced: Refining the fire; ideas that matter +++ Master/slave Mastery--Protocols: Focusing the intent of your relationship +++ Is THAT What They Meant? A book of practical communication insights

Education/Credentials
PhD, Urban Education Policy Studies with a minor in criminology, U of Wisconsin, Madison. EdM, Boston University with specialty in urban education Presented 80+ BDSM weekend conferences worldwide since 2007.

Awards and Honors
Pantheon of Leather Community Choice - Man, 2008

Past/Present Clients
Not applicable.

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