BDSM/money

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Question
I've recently entered this lifestyle as a switch.  And it seems that no matter how I contact a lady ( as a top or a bottom) I am sooner or later asked for money.  My question:  Is that all this whole thing is about a way for ladies to get money from men?  If that's the case when do I get to ask for money as a man, in this liberated world?

Answer
Hi Terry,

I'm sorry this has been your experience. Ask away for money---in this "liberated world". I use sarcasm because as a male you are mostly likely always in control in your day-to-day dealings, aren't questioned or look down upon if you choose to flaunt your sexuality, and are treated respectfully when you make decisions not necessarily understood by others. As a woman it can be a sign of independence to demand you receive compensation for your time, effort, and theatrics involved in topping/dominating/bottoming/demoing for someone. It can also be a sign of a predator, a scam, or just someone being greedy.

It's their decisions---if you don't like it, don't pay them. Simple as that. Obviously you already know the answer to your question that all women participating in the lifestyle do not receive money for participating in the scene, you're just upset you haven't met any yet.

Keep at it and don't come off as such a newbie, you make yourself easy prey that way as with anything of this nature that can be exploited.

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Natali Noir

Expertise

I can answer questions related to Mistresses/Dommes and their relationships with subs and slaves. I can answer questions about different fetishes, give advice, explain BDSM and dungeon etiquette or just explain overall BDSM practices and protocols as I've learned. I can also help with creative ideas related to kinky scenes, role-plays, punishments, or rewards.

Experience

I've been into BDSM for about 10 years and I've a Mistress for 8 years and have had my fair share of subs and slaves. I have experience with what it's like to be on both sides of the paddle.

Organizations
I'm part of the local TNG and Black Rose, and several FemDom groups. I also frequent the BDSM clubs and parties in the surrounding areas.

Publications
www.mundanetoms.blogspot.com

Education/Credentials
I have no educational credentials in this area, only years of firsthand experience and knowledge gained through reading, workshops, and listening to ideas from other individuals I deem more experienced in certain BDSM areas.

Awards and Honors
I write my own blog.

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