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BDSM/I need more in this LDR

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Question
I really don't know where to start, I met a guy in a non-BDSM chat room who said he was a Dom we started communicating via email as we live in different countries and fell into a sort of M/S relationship. we are both married so being together is impossible and our only contact is via email, which I have to initiate. I feel an amazing connection to him, a loyalty, a devotion he has brought out the submissive/slave part of me but apart from the terminology and his insistence that I obey and behave as he wishes I am not sure that this is a master/slave relationship. I have read other sites mainly B.E,S.T SLAVE training and they talk about Masters giving their slaves daily tasks and protocols to follow which I would welcome as I love it when Master does give me a task to do for him. I guess what I want to know is I am just being played by some 'dirty old man' who wants to fulfill his fantasies or do you think that this is real or has the potential to be real, and if so, how can I push him to take more control and require more of me? thank you for taking the time, I am sorry if this is unclear, it's not really clear to me either just a feeling

Answer
Tracey,

I can not answer if you are being played by a dirty old man or not, but I can say that if he was into this he would spend face to face time with you. With that being said I highly doubt that it is going to become *real* With Skype, facebook chat, and so many other video programs out there now days, there is no reason why he isnt giving you that personal time you sound like you need.

As for pushing him into taking more control I would suggest you talk to him, and explain to him how you are feeling and what it is you need.The thing about this is most seem to forget it is a relationship, and even as a slave or submissive, you NEED things in a relationship and if they are not being met, something is wrong. So you should be able to talk to him about these needs/desires/wants.. Once you do the talking, it should be his job, to decide what he is willing/able to give it to you.

Long distance is a bitch in a vanilla life, add D/s or M/s into the mix and it become ten times harder.

I would suggest you sign up for fetlife.com There are groups on there that deal with long distance relationships, which you can get alot more advice from, and find someone you can talk with on a regular bases and get the support you need, and learn  more about what works for long distance M/s.

I wish you luck, and sorry for the delay, holiday weekend and I was off with family.

Lady Aryana

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Lady Aryana

Expertise

Fem Dom relationships, Male Dom/fem slave, Master/slave relationships M/f, F/f, Long Distance relationships, Leather community, Victorian Lifestyle, BDSM play, Community support, Full time slavery and submission *living together, and how to adjust, protocols, and so forth. Web pages and site for help with finding others in your area. HOH or DD relationships. D/s has always been a part of me I am still active in looking for a relationship either D/s or Mistress/slave, or simply learning more in order to help others. I am always reading, either on the net or books.

Experience

I have been in long distance relationship that were D/s relationships. I have owned both male and female slaves/submissive, I have been both a real time slave, submissive, and submissive wife. I am not in a committed relationship at the moment. I just moved to Indina with in the last year. I can be found on Fetlife.com as LadyAryana. I am not collared, and I still am always on the look for others to play with around me. Slowing I am returning to being active in the community here in Indiana. In the past I have been active in the BDSM community and a DM for play parties. I have been active for the last 20+ yrs in BDSM in one way or another

Organizations
I was active in the GA community when I lived there. I am semi active in Indiana since moving here, I attend munches and demo's / play parties GRALE, Belong to PEP, and other BDSM clubs over the yrs.

Publications
Egroups, Blogs, Journals, And some story writings.

Education/Credentials
Have taken work shops for different BDSM events. Attended SELF given demo's, Been a DM for play parties and private and public clubs. Attending gathering of both D/s, Spanking lifestyles. I have been active in HOH and DD relationships. I was active in the leather community while living in GA. I was trained Victorian and and Gorean, I understand that training varies in each relationship so you adjust to what it is you do for the relationship you are in. I have trained both Master's and Mistress' along with slaves in the yrs I have been in BDSM.

Past/Present Clients
Master, slave, submissive, Tops, and Bottoms. Along with those who simply wanted to learn how to be kinky in the bedroom

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