You are here:

BDSM/submissive petnames

Advertisement


Question
Hello! Not so recently, but not too long ago, my fiancÚ and I decided to build a playroom in the house we've lived in for a little over a year now. At this point we've discovered that I am way more dominate than him and he is actually quite the masochist. But, being as he is the only sexual partner I've ever had--we've been dating for about 13 years--I don't have experience in what to call him. He has stuck to calling me "Mistress" and sometimes other female dominate pronouns, and when he dominates I call him "Master" and "Lord." when he dominates he also calls ME names like "Kitten" and then the occasional derogatory name, but I still don't know what to call him that not only shows my dominance but also has a seductive effect on him. So, What can I call my masochistic, Mexican, 5'6" fiancÚ when dominating him?

Answer
Hi Cyan

Thanks for the question. I just wanted to congratulate you on being the first every Kinky Question Of The Day on the new Mundane To Mistress podcast. I answered your question on the newest episode but incase you aren't able to listen, I'll transcribe what I said. It's also on the blog directly.

I always say there are no real parameters here. You can call your fiance anything that you please. I've found trying out the names you want to call someone in a mirror helps. You can do this in the morning while you're getting dressed. If you can't keep a straight face while saying it you might not want to use it.

For specific ideas on what will show dominance while still enticing him, you could try 'pet', 'good (or bad) boy', 'toy'. This sometimes puts the male in a position of feeling as if they are a kid again and need to respect authority---which happens to be you. If you like being condescending to your fiance while dominating him you could call him 'honey', 'sweetie', 'darling', 'baby', etc. This might make them feel undermined and inferior. Don't be afraid to play with these ideas and find a name that works for you.
If you'd like to hear more about what I suggested, listen to my new podcast. It's listed on the blog, I answer your question at about the 15 minute mark.

Good luck!

BDSM

All Answers


Answers by Expert:


Ask Experts

Volunteer


Natali Noir

Expertise

I can answer questions related to Mistresses/Dommes and their relationships with subs and slaves. I can answer questions about different fetishes, give advice, explain BDSM and dungeon etiquette or just explain overall BDSM practices and protocols as I've learned. I can also help with creative ideas related to kinky scenes, role-plays, punishments, or rewards.

Experience

I've been into BDSM for about 10 years and I've a Mistress for 8 years and have had my fair share of subs and slaves. I have experience with what it's like to be on both sides of the paddle.

Organizations
I'm part of the local TNG and Black Rose, and several FemDom groups. I also frequent the BDSM clubs and parties in the surrounding areas.

Publications
www.mundanetoms.blogspot.com

Education/Credentials
I have no educational credentials in this area, only years of firsthand experience and knowledge gained through reading, workshops, and listening to ideas from other individuals I deem more experienced in certain BDSM areas.

Awards and Honors
I write my own blog.

©2016 About.com. All rights reserved.