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Question
I am a 26 year old man. Recently I have become a nude model for a female painter. She is a woman in her late thirties and I model for her every week. To be honest the reason I decided to pose nude for her was because I am a submissive. Being nude in the presence of a woman heightens those submissive desires and I feel this incredible feeling of exhilaration every time I pose for her.

She has noticed that I get aroused from being nude in front of her and we have talked a little bit about how some people like being nude. As I have continued modelling for her she has increased the amount of time I spend in the nude. I have posed for her in the many different and sometimes vulnerable positions and even occasionally outdoors in her garden. Once one of her friends came over when I was posing for her and she just walked into the room while I was nude and expressed little surprise at my unclothed state. Both of them chatted like I wasn't even there while she painted and I felt like an object making me feel even more submissive.

I feel like doing more than simply posing nude though. I want to be tied up and even spanked by her. While she knows that I like posing nude she doesn't know that I am submissive. Do you have any ideas on how I should tell her about it? Do you think she will react negatively?

Answer
Hi John,

It sounds like you definitely have a fetish for CFNM (Clothed Female Naked Male) and possibly being objectified. I always think it's great when kinksters get to try out their kinks.
Your question was ultimately if you should tell this woman that you are submissive and want to be tied and spanked by her.

My answer is a complicated no.

You don't mention how long you have been modeling for her so I don't know how deep your connection is. However, I can tell you if I were in her position I would not want a self-described submissive natured person to ask/request/share their desire to be tied up and spanked by me and I'm very dominant. I would feel as if this would make things quite awkward (if I didn't feel the same) and would most likely result in me ending what was previously considered a fun and enjoyable endeavor. Mostly because it would not be something that we had agreed upon at the beginning.

Now, you can certainly be open to the idea that one day she may ask to do those things to you. But, you don't necessarily know what she is getting from painting you in the nude. Perhaps it is purely artistic, maybe it arouses her to know that you are aroused, maybe she feels relaxed painting you, or maybe it's something else entirely. Whatever the case may be I feel like if you try to steer your time together to be mostly not mutually beneficial to you then you run the risk of ruining what you do have. I'm not saying there is no chance she will be keen on the idea, I'm just saying if she isn't you probably won't be able to go back to the way things were.

I would suggest finding someone else who can help fill these desires. But, if you do decide to share this with her I'd love to hear what her response was.

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Natali Noir

Expertise

I can answer questions related to Mistresses/Dommes and their relationships with subs and slaves. I can answer questions about different fetishes, give advice, explain BDSM and dungeon etiquette or just explain overall BDSM practices and protocols as I've learned. I can also help with creative ideas related to kinky scenes, role-plays, punishments, or rewards.

Experience

I've been into BDSM for about 10 years and I've a Mistress for 8 years and have had my fair share of subs and slaves. I have experience with what it's like to be on both sides of the paddle.

Organizations
I'm part of the local TNG and Black Rose, and several FemDom groups. I also frequent the BDSM clubs and parties in the surrounding areas.

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www.mundanetoms.blogspot.com

Education/Credentials
I have no educational credentials in this area, only years of firsthand experience and knowledge gained through reading, workshops, and listening to ideas from other individuals I deem more experienced in certain BDSM areas.

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I write my own blog.

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