Expert: arani_CsA - 10/4/2007

Question
What is a Gorean slave?  Am new to the scene but VERY interested in developing skills and enjoying.  Introduced by dom man who switches.  Can you advise how I could please?  What could I do that would surprise or excite him?  Sorry sound naive but am!  NO hang ups just need spark to start to use my imagination.  Help!  Thank you.

Answer
Hello...

Thanks for sending your question my way.  I'll try to help you find out what you want to know.

Gor is a very specific sub-group within the BDSM lifestyle.  Goreans take inspiration from a group of fantasy novels written in the 60s and 70s, about a planet where men rule and women are slaves, and everyone is rather barbaric.  The books also contain a lot of philosophy about male-female relationships.  This is a gross over-simplification, but if you want to learn more see if you can find a book called "Tarnsman of Gor," by John Norman.  It's the first in the series, but most likely isn't in print any longer.  You can find it used through E-bay.  Or visit http://www.dreamstrike.com to learn more.

I also suggest that you spend some time reading about the BDSM lifestyle in general.  You mentioned that you have been spending time with a Dominant who switches -- in Gor there are no switches, there are also no male slaves or female Dominants.   But there are many other places where these people are welcomed.  Here are some good places to start your research:
http://www.castlerealm.com
http://www.leathernroses.com
http://steel-door.com/Chamber.html

I also suggest that you find a BDSM group that meets in your area.  You can find a listing of such groups, by state, at http://www.drkdesyre.com  Attend a few meetings, talk to people, and observe how they interact with each other.  Be aware, though, that these groups are often suspicious of newcomers because of confidentiality issues.  

Now, as far as surprising this man, it depends on what kind of things he enjoys.  Take some time observing what kind of food he likes, or music, or other activities.  Cook him a meal, wash his car, learn to belly dance, and so on.  If he likes kinky sex, try surprising him by setting a romantic scene with candles, a few scarves for bondage, a blindfold, collar and leash, and perhaps a toy whip or ping-pong paddle.  Again, use your powers of observation to find out what he enjoys.

Good luck to you, and if you have any more questions feel free to send them my way.

arani_CsA,
devoted property of Clampius_Arelius