| Subject | Date Asked |
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| New relationship in D/s | 10/5/2008 |
Q: I have been in the lifestyle for 8 years but until a year or so ago started exploring more of the ...
A: Paddles (Used moderately, but repeatedly, until the ass is bright red), and real light "sting" type ...
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| conflicting urges | 10/3/2008 |
Q: I am a 22 guy who is really confused. ive been having sex with both men and women since i was 16. ...
A: Personally, it sounds to me as if you are a bisexual, sub/switch, male with a leaning towards ...
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| serivice | 9/17/2008 |
Q: I am considering becoming the slave to a man that i will sign my surrender to him in december when ...
A: First, I would have to ask if those boundaries are clearly defined? That could be a part of the ...
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| Long Distance Play and Switching? | 9/6/2008 |
Q: My girlfriend and I (w're in a lesbian relationship) are separated by several states. I adore her, ...
A: As far as Dom time, and sub time, I would set up a regular schedule with the times on it, so that ...
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| Bringing in knife play | 9/3/2008 |
Q: Master Shadow, I'm a sub, with a master who I think is ideal for me. Our d/s is mainly sexual, which ...
A: This is where honesty in all things comes into play. How is He to know, if you don't discuss your ...
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| web site for Castle Realm | 8/31/2008 |
Q: Sir, i am wanting to go into your web site but unable to. i use to be able to when i was a slave for ...
A: There seems to be a little confusion on this. I am not, nor was I ever the owner of CastleRealm. ...
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| relationship | 8/27/2008 |
Q: can me and my master have a normal relationship.I love him as a master and care for him as a ...
A: Branding is done often these days as a part of a subculture in regards to tattoos and piercing. ...
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| relationship | 8/26/2008 |
Q: can me and my master have a normal relationship.I love him as a master and care for him as a ...
A: I would say yes, for the most part, keeping in mind of coarse that you ARE in a BDSM relationship. ...
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| New to BDSM | 8/19/2008 |
Q: I am a new Dom and I met this woman that is a very experienced Sub, she originally was trained in ...
A: A collar of consideration can be almost anything You choose it to be. A decent necklace usually ...
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| Slave Jewelry | 8/11/2008 |
Q: I am new to the lifestyle and was wondering if there was any protocol to the wearing of a slave ...
A: As far as I know, there is no set protocol for anklets. Usually, it's the Dominants choice as to ...
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| The Alpha within?? | 8/10/2008 |
Q: I am a sub to a rather creative and devious Mistress. Ms A. often enjoys scenes with two male subs. ...
A: Quite honestly, I not only think the Alpha and Top not only can be balanced, but are necessarily so ...
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| The Alpha within?? | 8/4/2008 |
Q: I am a sub to a rather creative and devious Mistress. Ms A. often enjoys scenes with two male subs. ...
A: Enjoy it for what it is. Your Mistress is very smart. She, by having you do this, has literally ...
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| What do i do?? | 8/4/2008 |
Q: I meet My Master over a year ago on line, it as my understanding that it would be online for a while ...
A: This is going to be a bit rough, but if your Dominant hasn't kept His promises in all of this time, ...
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| Fisting and bondage | 7/31/2008 |
Q: i have 2 seperate questions. 1. my boyfriend wants to try midori style bondage on me... what the ...
A: Midori is a Who, not a "what", so to speak. Midori is heavily into Japanese Rope Bondage, which can ...
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| A sub fem's concerns... | 7/30/2008 |
Q: I want to ask your advice if I may? I have recently started a relationship with a Dom, and he is ...
A: This requires imagination on your part. There is no one pat answer for this question, as what turns ...
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| New to the BD/SM life style | 7/27/2008 |
Q: Sir I have a Master but my question is he has another and I am wondering how do I please my master ...
A: At this point, I would start asking questions as to His plans with you. If He is with another to ...
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| New to the BD/SM life style | 7/26/2008 |
Q: Sir I have a Master but my question is he has another and I am wondering how do I please my master ...
A: Just please Him as you would normally do. Show yourself as worthy of your collar. I take it that ...
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| Being Collared | 7/12/2008 |
Q: I an very vanilla in this lifestyle. However, in saying that I'm a quick learner, sub. My Master ...
A: First of all, let me congratulate the both of Y/you! Being collared means you have been found ...
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| Castle Realm | 7/12/2008 |
Q: i use to read and study a lot of the articles on castlerealm but it seems the site has closed down ...
A: I would try Domsubfriends.com for another site. This is not a learning site, per se, but does have ...
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| New Sub | 7/11/2008 |
Q: Although I have always felt submissive in my 'vanilla' relationships, I am uncertain as to how to ...
A: The only way for you to know if the Lifestyle is for you is to experience it first hand. ...
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| Castle Realm | 7/9/2008 |
Q: I have been looking online for quite a while now and I saw your previous answer about castle realm ...
A: So far, I have been unable to reach Lord Colm, or the CastleRealm site, despite numerous e mails. I ...
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| ceremonies | 7/8/2008 |
Q: was speaking with a Master at a recent play party and He was explaining the difference between a sub ...
A: While I have personally never seen, nor heard of the "Taking of The Slave" ceremony, it doesn't ...
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| New Domme | 7/2/2008 |
Q: What kind of boundaries should I set for my sub? We are both new to the world of BDSM. Also, do I ...
A: Good questions! First off, You do NOT need to have been a sub, or slave to be a Domme, although many ...
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| Information on Domme | 6/30/2008 |
Q: I am a married woman of 6 years. I have had the urge and willingness to be a sub in rl. Its in my ...
A: I would be honest with your need. Tell Him it is time, if He wants to try it. Explain how you feel. ...
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| submissive training | 6/25/2008 |
Q: Sir: Do you have information, or can you direct me to a site where i might get some information on ...
A: Sorry for the lateness of this answer. I had to double check my resources before sending them to ...
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| starting place... | 6/15/2008 |
Q: i had it, but he wanted other girls, so i am back at square one...I guess I am at a loss at this ...
A: Of coarse you can do it. Just be more discerning this time. As I said earlier, do not "settle" for ...
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| starting place... | 6/15/2008 |
Q: i had it, but he wanted other girls, so i am back at square one...I guess I am at a loss at this ...
A: I would start out by going to munches, sloshes, and events. I would also place a few profiles on ...
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| grin | 6/12/2008 |
Q: At school, everyone knows me as a sweet, innocent, kind, friendly, fun girl. I'm also a virgin. So ...
A: Not sure what the grin was for, but I suspect that it has something to do with the fact that you not ...
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| breaking up from my master | 6/7/2008 |
Q: submassive women and a slave' reacently i fell my master is building his way out, i am scard so ...
A: If he left you because he wanted out of bdsm, then it was never in his heart in the first place. The ...
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| breaking up from my master | 6/4/2008 |
Q: submassive women and a slave' reacently i fell my master is building his way out, i am scard so ...
A: Not knowing how long the two of Y/you have been together, I would have to say first of all, you need ...
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| Domination | 5/31/2008 |
Q: Master, I would like to know a bit more bout behavior and rules for a Dominator
A: Your question would have to be a little more specific. In general, most Dominants adhere to a set of ...
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| custody | 5/28/2008 |
Q: I really need some help and advice. I was married to my husband for 5 years and we have a 4 year old ...
A: I guess then that my next question would be has He ever actually seen anything to do with bdsm? Or ...
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| CASTLE REALM | 5/28/2008 |
Q: Any idea what happened to shut down castle realm? or where I can find the wealth of information once ...
A: I have repeatedly requested info myself on this from the site owner without any response so far as ...
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| custody | 5/25/2008 |
Q: I really need some help and advice. I was married to my husband for 5 years and we have a 4 year old ...
A: This is a sticky situation, especially due to the bad light that bdsm Lifestylers are shown in by ...
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| life changing experience....what's your take on it? | 5/6/2008 |
Q: I have been talking to a "sissy slave" online for the past 2 months or so, and I am greatly enjoying ...
A: Wow! Give me a bit of time to answer this, as it requires a bit of thought. Your question deserves ...
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| life changing experience....what's your take on it? | 5/5/2008 |
Q: I have been talking to a "sissy slave" online for the past 2 months or so, and I am greatly enjoying ...
A: This is not an easy set of questions to answer. First off, congratulations on your introduction into ...
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| Concerned about a dear sadistic Top | 5/4/2008 |
Q: I've been enjoying rather intense scenes with a dear friend/Top for about a year now. As I am a ...
A: It sounds like either there's a serious problem She is hiding, or, more likely She cares for you ...
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| How can I bring my wife to BDSM Life Style | 5/4/2008 |
Q: ...Sorry for disturbing you again... I have just got married to a good chaste Hindu girl. I also a ...
A: First off, my dear friend, you should have discussed this with Her BEFORE the marriage, but ...
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| How a person become interested in BDSM? | 5/1/2008 |
Q: How a person become interested in BDSM? From Birth? Environment? or Both of them? In my case. I did ...
A: This is a very good question. It has several parts in the answer, as several areas must be covered. ...
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| Starting out in knife play | 4/19/2008 |
Q: I have played with knives on myself for many years to various levels. Recently i have gained a ...
A: Where to begin? Sensual knife play can be very rewarding, if done properly. The object is to make ...
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| My wife is doing painful tortures during our BDSM,Please tell me a solution | 4/3/2008 |
Q: Please Read and give me your advice My age is 25.My wife Suvetha also 25.(I am a software engineer ...
A: First of all, let me congratulate you on your recent marriage. This is a blessed event, which should ...
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| Anal sex and Enemas | 10/4/2007 |
Q: I am a sub that enjoys and loves anal play and being given an enema. On average I would say that I ...
A: Actually, yes. Too many enemas too many times can result in possible infections, either to the anal ...
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| Unusual, morbid fetish | 9/28/2007 |
Q: I have a somewhat unusual "fetish"(if that is the correct word?) that involves elaborate fantasies ...
A: This fantasy is not as rare as you might think. It would, in the BDSM Lifestyle, be considered fear ...
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| Currious about status of scene in Terre Haute... | 9/4/2007 |
Q: I sent a private question, but it didn't seem to go through, so I am making this one public, sorry ...
A: Yes. Actually, there is. But many tend to be low key about T/their involvement in the Lifestyle ...
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| butt plugs | 8/31/2007 |
Q: I take a antidepresant called CELEXA - unfortunately, one of the main side effects is that it ...
A: I think first that I would seek another antidepressant without the sexual side effects, if possible. ...
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| ways to find | 8/31/2007 |
Q: .was wondering what sites You would recommend to find a female sex/domestic slave. collar me is a ...
A: Alt also has a free area where You can chat for free. Viewing profiles, and seeing bigger pictures ...
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| ways to find | 8/30/2007 |
Q: .was wondering what sites You would recommend to find a female sex/domestic slave. collar me is a ...
A: Personally, I would recommend Alt.com, a free alternative Lifestyle Chat site. There You can place a ...
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| KNIFE PLAY | 8/29/2007 |
Q: I deals in swords/knives and had a booth at a fetish fair this past weekend. Most of the Dom's were ...
A: There is no set design that is better than any other as far as knife play is concerned, but I can ...
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| feminization | 8/25/2007 |
Q: What is the purpose of making a male sub wear women's bras, panties, and attire?
A: Many men get a vicarious thrill out of wearing the clothes of the oposite sex. These men usually ...
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| switching | 8/23/2007 |
Q: i am and have been in a long distance relationship with a Dom in the UK for the last 3 years. ...
A: I would write the three essays, two where He is Dominant, and one where You are Dominant. Use Y/your ...
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| how to punish 2 girls | 8/16/2007 |
Q: "Hi, I'm going to be having a 3-sum soon with my gf and her mate and they've both agreed that i can ...
A: Personally, I would make them both kneel facing away from each other, then fasten their ankles each ...
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| blood chokes | 8/14/2007 |
Q: Can I ask what blood chokes are its not something I have heard of.
A: A blood choke is basically nothing more than a sleeper hold. The blood supply is cut off of to the ...
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| Definition and difference. | 8/12/2007 |
Q: Here in the UK, we have a couple of "terms" for which I'm pretty sure I know the Definition and ...
A: While it is prevelant in many new Dominants, it is not necessarily prevelant in ALL new Dominants. ...
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| Definition and difference. | 8/9/2007 |
Q: Here in the UK, we have a couple of "terms" for which I'm pretty sure I know the Definition and ...
A: A wannabe is someone who pretends to have an active interest in the BDSM Lifestyle. They are ...
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| Reminders | 8/3/2007 |
Q: My partner and I are into light BDSM. She has asked that I wear a cock harness as a personal ...
A: There are a great many ideas on this. My own opinion would be to get her tatooed. Something simple, ...
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| Slave tests | 8/2/2007 |
Q: first of all I hope you don't take any offense at my question. I am married and currently serving in ...
A: I have thought long and hard on this question, and realised I need more information about the two of ...
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| earning your leather | 8/2/2007 |
Q: I would like to ask you if you have any information as i have gotten many different answers and i ...
A: There are actually a couple of ways to "Earn Your Leathers". The original, Old Guard method was to ...
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| edge play | 8/1/2007 |
Q: Can you tell me about edge play like fire and water play?
A: Edge play, such as fireplay, drowning scenes, breathplay, and bloodchokes should be left to those ...
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| improvised and non-mood-killing restraints | 7/28/2007 |
Q: I find that all of the elaborateness of BDSM doesnt work much, for me. I'm the dominant member in ...
A: I would suggest arm binders. Thy are quick to apply, and hold the arms immobile behind the slave ...
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| Breaking scenes | 7/21/2007 |
Q: We have been wanting to do a Breaking scene, I’m not into corporal but it’s not a limit. My domme ...
A: Sensory deprivation is the first thing that comes to mind, along with a submission scene, wherein ...
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| tit torture | 7/16/2007 |
Q: . .recently he asked me to alter one of my bras and i am wondering if you think this is safe. . .I ...
A: So long as the spikes do not enter too far, or cause open wounds, I see no problem with the mod of ...
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| help in training a sub | 7/8/2007 |
Q: well i wantted to get my hubby into it but he was afrade of it and he didnt know what to think. he ...
A: Get 'her' some ruffly panties and make 'her' wear them under her slacks. Get her some lace top ...
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| help in training a sub | 7/4/2007 |
Q: well i wantted to get my hubby into it but he was afrade of it and he didnt know what to think. he ...
A: I would think it was time to go shopping for "clothes" for your "girl". There are many second hand ...
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| Humiliation, degrading play, etc | 7/3/2007 |
Q: My MASTER wants me to come up with more ideas for degrading me. We are into humiliating, nasty play ...
A: Without knowing more as to the meaning of "nasty play" I can offer few ideas, but might have some ...
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| Giving my GF a "hard" punishment | 7/1/2007 |
Q: I've been with my gf for 2 years and we've done bdsm all the way through the relationship and ...
A: Personally, it sounds as if You have things well in hand already. You could also throw in flogging, ...
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| point system | 6/27/2007 |
Q: I keep hearing about a points system. I have a sub who keeps telling me about this and I have no ...
A: Personally, I have never heard of a point system, but I guess it is possible that one exists, ...
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| testing a slave | 6/16/2007 |
Q: How does a female Dom, test a male slave as an introduction of their worthiness?
A: Exactly! Whatever task You put him to do, then that is what he is to do to prove his worthiness to ...
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| Collar of Consideration | 6/12/2007 |
Q: Good evening! i have met the Man who may be my Master. In the seven years that i've been active in ...
A: First off, congratulations on finding your Master! It is an awesome thing to discover the One you ...
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| Information needed for novices. | 6/1/2007 |
Q: Don't know exactly where to start. I have had an online BDSM relationship and was a virgin in real ...
A: Here are a few of the sites I have found in the States on the Internet in regards to your needs. i ...
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| ageplay | 5/31/2007 |
Q: Im a 20 year old female and after a long seperation from my paartner who is a 24 year old male- we ...
A: This is a hard question to answer. The first thing you have to ask yourself is "Which is more ...
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| Information needed for novices. | 5/29/2007 |
Q: Don't know exactly where to start. I have had an online BDSM relationship and was a virgin in real ...
A: Without knowing the State, or area where you live, this would be hard to answer specifically. There ...
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| DomSpace/DomDrop | 5/18/2007 |
Q: Ok, if you remember Me and My question about subspace, you HAD to know this was coming !!! lol Just ...
A: Yes, I remember :). Domspace is the adrenalin high that is associated with a Dominant when scening ...
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| humiliation | 5/16/2007 |
Q: My boyfriend like me to come up with things for him to do to humiliate me and i am running out of ...
A: Well, puppy play comes to mind, including making you eat petfood and drink out of pet dishes without ...
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| subspace/subdrop | 5/16/2007 |
Q: What is "subdrop"? I understand subspace, but what is the BEST and safest aftercare for a Dominant ...
A: Yes, You have the gist of it. The sub becomes almost child like when in this state, and the best ...
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| subspace/subdrop | 5/16/2007 |
Q: What is "subdrop"? I understand subspace, but what is the BEST and safest aftercare for a Dominant ...
A: When scened, the endorphin levels are raised slowly with the application of pain. Subdrop is when ...
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| Complicated BDSM relationship | 5/4/2007 |
Q: I will bless you and thank you a lot to have your advice So here it is: About Me: I am 25 ...
A: First off, I would quit trying to change Her. She is living Her life the way She chooses, as any ...
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| Birth control pills | 5/3/2007 |
Q: Why would someone ask me to not be on birth control pills? I know the obvious answer is that he ...
A: Birth control pills have many nasty side effects which, in my opinion far outweigh the benefits. ...
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| Fire Play | 5/1/2007 |
Q: How/where can I find someone to learn fire play from in the upper Midwest (preferably Wisconsin or ...
A: Going to events such as Kinky Kollege, or Sinsations in Leather, both located near the Chicago area, ...
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| CBT | 3/9/2007 |
Q: What wil happen to my husband's balls if they are kept forcd up inside him.
A: Keeping your husbands testicles up inside his body is vary dangerous, and may cause either ...
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| control | 1/24/2007 |
Q: this girl has ask for your advise. Is there such a thing as a Master that can train a girl in the ...
A: Truly, girl, there is a way this can be done. However, it takes a strong Master, who is willing to ...
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| Marking of SLave | 1/20/2007 |
Q: My Slave would liked to be marked by me his Domme, he is not talking Piercings or Tattoos he is ...
A: Branding is not actually abuse, if agreed to by both parties. It can, however, if not done properly ...
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| anal play | 1/2/2007 |
Q: my girlfriend and I have been enjoying the practice of bdsm for a while now but are starting to move ...
A: Anal play is an exciting thing to many. There is nothing that says submission like having the ...
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| spanking my gf | 12/12/2006 |
Q: we always use blindfolds and handcuffs whenever we spank each other. her favourite way to be spanked ...
A: I did answer this once before, but apearently, it was never sent. There are many things which can be ...
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| spanking my gf | 12/12/2006 |
Q: i have been with my gf for a year now and have been spanking each other for about 4 months. we have ...
A: One way is to tie her wrists to her ankles, with legs either spread, or together on the bed. This ...
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| duct tape | 12/11/2006 |
Q: isn't there any way to duct tape urself up? i mean the ankles, thighs, wrists, and gag. thanks!
A: Obviously there is. One starts with the ankles, then the thighs. The gag would be next. The wrists ...
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| need help | 11/30/2006 |
Q: could you tell me names of movies with a bdsm, or domination theme, prefrebly from 80's era. and i ...
A: This falls outside of my area of expertise. I do not watch porn of any type, including BD/SM, ...
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| question | 11/29/2006 |
Q: my name is Steve. I am a 29 year old submissive male who's into soft bondage only. I am not into ...
A: While it is true that I do answer BD/SM questions, I am located in the States, and have very few ...
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| Broken tv | 11/17/2006 |
Q: I have a TV it turns on,but after about a minute it turns off.I turn it back on it turns off.I`m ...
A: Even though this has nothing to do with the BD/SM lifestyle, I will attempt to answer it. It sounds ...
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| Chokes | 11/9/2006 |
Q: What is the difference between a blood choke, and a regular choke hold?
A: A blood choke restricts the blood supply to the brain through the carotid artery, whereas a regular ...
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| Cupping | 11/9/2006 |
Q: My sub is interested in cupping, and I need to find out what it is, and how is it done
A: Cupping is an ancient Chinese technique often used for such ailments as arthritis. Cupping is ...
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| cupping, What is it? | 11/9/2006 |
Q: I wanted to know what cupping is. My new sub was telling me she wants to try it.
A: Cupping is a technique whereby a cotton ball is soaked in either alcohol, or some other volatile ...
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| Time between scenes. | 11/8/2006 |
Q: How much time should I give my sub between scenes? I know she will be sore for a while, but am not ...
A: Usually a week should suffice for most scenes, as it takes about a week for the bruises and marks to ...
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| Meeting a new sub real time | 11/8/2006 |
Q: What precautions should I take when meeting a new sub for the first time. Any advice on this? We're ...
A: When meeting someone in the lifestyle for the first time, safecalls should be set up. This is where ...
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| sexual issue | 9/3/2006 |
Q: my name is dana.i find out lately sexual needs from my boyfriend that he is crazy about my feet ...
A: Tell him straight out that if he wants to do these things, that he will have to kneel, literally, at ...
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| collaring ceremony | 8/30/2006 |
Q: my Master wished me to research a collaring ceremony for our area. We are located within 50 miles ...
A: groups.yahoo.com/group/AlabamaBDSM http://www.geocities.com/adadslilangel/index.html ...
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| Fetishes and humiliation | 7/27/2006 |
Q: me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 4 months now. he has a major foot fetish and is ...
A: Forced feminization, with verbal humiliation would work for starters. Dress him in womans clothes, ...
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