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BDSM/Questions Answered by Expert Lady Aryana
| Subject | Date Asked |
| please suggest some severe punishment methods | 11/16/2009 |
| Q: ... I am a married lady of age 25. My husband's age is also the same. We are living in India. I am a ... A: Suvetha First off let me suggest a few books you should order, you can get them off Amazon.com ... | |
| Domme and vanilla partner | 11/8/2009 |
| Q: Good morning Lady Aryana, I'm 49, very vanilla, very Alpha male, involved with an East Indian woman ... A: Graham, This is a hard one, not cause its something that causes issues but it really comes down to ... | |
| Gorean lifestyle | 11/7/2009 |
| Q: Lady Aryana, Hello SIR and I are starting to go down the path of living the Gorean life and I am ... A: lori, First off let me suggest you and your *Sir* do some real soul searching before deciding to ... | |
| Lost | 11/5/2009 |
| Q: This question is going to be hard for me to write simply because it's difficult for me to explain ... A: Sara, Sounds like you need to start journal your thoughts and feelings, allowing him to read them, ... | |
| Roles | 11/5/2009 |
| Q: What is the difference between a Domme, Mistress and Mommy? A: kimberly, That is kinda one of those questions where it depends on what setting you are talking ... | |
| Sub/Slave | 11/4/2009 |
| Q: I have an online relationship with a Dom and he has started to mention meeting up. He says that I ... A: Chris, First off, you need to sit and talk to your Dom and ask him the same thing you just asked ... | |
| Mental Dominance | 10/24/2009 |
| Q: Greetings, I am currently involved in a long-distance relationship that has bondage aspects as well ... A: John, First off, remember that during these times, anything that you have her do for you, be it ... | |
| Becoming a Mistress | 10/21/2009 |
| Q: I'm rather new to the bdsm scene and have come into possession of a male sub who has recently ... A: Anna, First take a deep breath, your going to need it... We all go through this phase when we first ... | |
| Erotic Humilation | 10/6/2009 |
| Q: Six months ago I hired a 26 year old young women to work at my company (Maryam) and over the past ... A: David, First if there are red flags are alarms going off with you and her I would listen to them.. ... | |
| bdsm relationship | 10/6/2009 |
| Q: Ok im having a problem getting through to my girl. she says she likes ... A: Lucian, Sounds like your girl is having a problem with depression, and needs help.. I would suggest ... | |
| being gentle? | 10/4/2009 |
| Q: it took awhile but my wife finally opened up to me that she is interested in trying the bdsm ... A: Jordan, You can be gentle when it comes to BDSM... Go out and get some feathers, or a nice dear ... | |
| Master/slave relationship | 9/28/2009 |
| Q: my wife and i are experimenting with the master/slave relationship with me being the master. I was ... A: Damian, This is up to you and her.. If she wants to be a complete slave then treat her as you wish, ... | |
| Please guide | 9/27/2009 |
| Q: First of all, Sorry my english is not fluent. Please be kind enough to read and guide us. I am from ... A: Naveen, Sounds like you need to figure out if this is truly what you want.. What I read here, for ... | |
| BDSM | 9/24/2009 |
| Q: I am Jai from india. I am 32 years old, and interested in bdsm. Since my childhood, i have been ... A: Jai, First off you need to understand BDSM or Domination and submission isn't about anger or ... | |
| bdsm i need help understanding please help???? | 9/19/2009 |
| Q: Ok so I am a lesbian currently engaged to a girl. She says she understands bdsm but won't explain it ... A: Brandy, BDSM varys from relationship to relationship.. What one person see it another might night.. ... | |
| Sub/Boyfriend Training | 9/18/2009 |
| Q: Lady Aryana, Thank you for taking the time to take this question. My girlfriend and I have been ... A: James, Congrates on finding the lifestyle and a girlfriend who is willing to at least explore it ... | |
| Lady Aryana | 9/15/2009 |
| Q: ANSWER: Glenn, Sorry it has taken me so long, I have not had internet service due to personal ... A: Glenn, I would suggest you get out there and do the leg work.. Find your local groups where you can ... | |
| Advice for inclusion | 9/15/2009 |
| Q: my wife and i have a fantastic sexual relationship. we both love to try and like lots and have. but, ... A: Mike, Switching is hard, esp when you first enter into this kind of relationship. Most times there ... | |
| Beginning slave training techniques & protocols | 9/8/2009 |
| Q: Both Master & myself are new to the lifestyle, but we do lots of research to try to learn as much as ... A: Jody, Training comes in many flavors, just like ice cream... What I would do might not be what you ... | |
| Research | 9/7/2009 |
| Q: I was married for a very long time to a vanilla guy. I was always the one to provide sex to get ... A: Renee, I will try to answer your questions as well as I can depending on what you are asking. As ... | |
| Novice to BDSM in relationship with mostly sub male | 9/7/2009 |
| Q: I met a guy about 4 months ago who was looking for a BDSM relationship. He said he could be dom or ... A: Stoney, Actually this is not out of the norm,, Let me suggest a few things for the both of you..... ... | |
| Lady Aryana | 9/7/2009 |
| Q: hi i been in the closet all my life i been wanting to be at a womans feet all my life ever since i ... A: Glenn, Sorry it has taken me so long, I have not had internet service due to personal reasons. Let ... | |
| bizarre humiliation | 9/2/2009 |
| Q: They decided to see if they could insert live minnows or worms into my uterus or anus. I was just ... A: Sarah, I would say it's possible but as for safe, I wouldnt allow anything alive to be placed ... | |
| hurt slave | 9/2/2009 |
| Q: i have been in a M/s relationship long distance for 2+ years. Last night i turn on my im hoping to ... A: christie, I have to say if you are upset cause he is connected to someone else, then I would have ... | |
| 24/7 chastity, who are these women? | 8/29/2009 |
| Q: I am new to the idea of 24/7 chastity, and was just wondering what the personal/professional market ... A: Kevin, I would have to say no that you would not find this kind of relationship rewarding, sin you ... | |
| new to this | 8/27/2009 |
| Q: I am new to being a submissive and I have a mistress that isn't willing to take us to the next step ... A: Jennifer, First off, this is a learning process, and if she isn't willing to teach you then you ... | |
| bdsm in india | 8/8/2009 |
| Q: can you tell me if there are any dominatrix in india especially mumbai A: Akshar, Sorry I do not know any Dominatrix's in India period, so I can not answer this question,, ... | |
| My sadistic boyfriend | 8/6/2009 |
| Q: I've been with my boyfriend for about 9 months now-though there has been some breaking up and ... A: Alex, what a lot to get into here, I will try to answer as much as I can at the moment, although I ... | |
| punishments | 8/4/2009 |
| Q: I'm new to this and was needing all the help I can get on punishments and any thing else I need to ... A: Punishments can come in many forms, although they need to be what ever you feel comfortable with.. ... | |
| Wife Dom | 4/10/2009 |
| Q: I am Siva from Kerala state of India. The BDSM in India is almost non existant, but I am and having ... A: Slva, I want to wish you luck in your relationship, I know how hard it will be for you and her to ... | |
| Slave training: 24/7 Female slave | 3/18/2009 |
| Q: I am a 24/7 live in female slave, both master an my self are new to this, but are learning and ... A: Jody, I really cant tell you where you can get ebooks for free when it comes to training,, Although ... | |
| wedding vows between doms/and slaves | 3/12/2009 |
| Q: do you have any examples of wedding vows pronouced between doms/slaves my Mistress and I are ... A: Pink, First off let me say good luck.. Also I am sorry it has taken me so long, I have been ill and ... | |
| Training one another, helping, or topping from the bottom? | 3/10/2009 |
| Q: So, I'm scared to ask my parents (in the Lifestyle as well) about this. I'm 20, and since I was ... A: MizzB I am glad to hear you have been allowed to explore the information your parents have and ... | |
| application to Sir from boy | 3/2/2009 |
| Q: i'm trying to write an application to Sir for possibly becoming his boy. i was wondering if there is ... A: Michael, There are no specific protocols when you write out a petition. You should speak from your ... | |
| Protocol | 2/25/2009 |
| Q: A FemDom Mistress friend of mine chastized me for greeting the submissive at her side "greetings ... A: Seis, Unless he is a switch he is submissive and he should respond and be greeted as such. If he ... | |
| Health concerns | 2/23/2009 |
| Q: I am a little older but have always had fantasies about submission. I have met a man online and I ... A: Suzanne, Actually when you drink urine there is nothing unhealthy about it if you drink it right ... | |
| Long Distance slave contract examples? | 2/12/2009 |
| Q: I have recently moved across country from my Dom. We both feel that I, and our relationship, would ... A: Zoe, I am not sure just what you are looking for when you say a Long Distance contract.. There are ... | |
| enema | 2/12/2009 |
| Q: greetings mrs marie... i thank you for ur useful help about fisting.. i'd also like to know about ... A: slutman, I have tried the first two, syringes, and funnel..These are safe for enema play although I ... | |
| D/s Lifestyle? | 2/12/2009 |
| Q: I am very interested in the D/s lifestyle. I have done some D/s play and some pain play with former ... A: Nicole, I wish I could give you some positive insight but most community's demand you be 21 or ... | |
| topping from the bottom | 2/11/2009 |
| Q: Could you please enplane what topping from the bottom means? I have been told by a few Doms , that I ... A: aprilrain Topping from the bottom means you are trying to control what is going on. It seems ... | |
| shocked | 2/9/2009 |
| Q: I've recently started dating a man and we've really hit it off. He's handsome, smart, funny, rich ... A: Tara, I am sorry you are finding yourself in this mess although before jumping and doing something ... | |
| enema | 2/6/2009 |
| Q: greetings mrs marie... i thank you for ur useful help about fisting.. i'd also like to know about ... A: slutman, I have some information on enema's although this has been a busy weekend for me, so give ... | |
| fisting in bdsm | 2/5/2009 |
| Q: greeting mrs marie....am a sub male slut and am new to bdsm...i'd like 2 get fisted anally...is that ... A: Getting fisted anally simply means taking it show to start with, and remember lube is your FRIEND. ... | |
| why must there always be another submissibe before i get what i need | 1/31/2009 |
| Q: My Master and i have have been together for almost three years. The question is i enjyoy bondage ... A: kitten, Yea your needs are important, although the Master/Mistress will have the right to decide ... | |
| getting back to where we started | 1/24/2009 |
| Q: I am in a relationship that started with us both interested in BDSM. Over the years it has seemed to ... A: Rose, I am glad to hear that you are communicating with him.. I am sorry to hear that he is ... | |
| getting back to where we started | 1/21/2009 |
| Q: I am in a relationship that started with us both interested in BDSM. Over the years it has seemed to ... A: rose, I am sorry I have not gotten back to you sooner, I have been trying to figure this out other ... | |
| how to address my Master | 1/20/2009 |
| Q: is there a proper way to address my Master in a social setting that contains people who are not in ... A: Aisling, This really is up to him... His wishes to what he would like you to address him when out ... | |
| Asked to Domme | 1/16/2009 |
| Q: My fiance recently revealed that he wishes to be dominated. Rather than having him go elsewhere I ... A: This will change over time, there is pretty much nothing you cant do if you both agree to it. The ... | |
| I'm kinda new. | 1/14/2009 |
| Q: I'm kinda new to the whole BDSM scene, I've always liked to control the person I'm with and enjoy ... A: Ashes, Well it sounds like you are needing to learn to control the Dom side of yourself. Only time, ... | |
| New Relationship he is sub | 1/9/2009 |
| Q: I hope you can point me in the correct direction, I am starting a new relationship and the guy is ... A: Robin, Hope you are having a wonderful New Yr. Now as for books, there are a few you can check ... | |
| Dom with a collared Sub | 9/19/2008 |
| Q: I am rather new to BDSM, but I have been doing tuns of research and exploring of information. In ... A: Butterfly, Actually there is no reason to why he he can relieve his current submissive from her ... | |
| Not sure about the D/s lifestyle could you help me understand it? | 9/5/2008 |
| Q: I have just started seeing this new guy and from what I can tell he seems to be quite into the D/s ... A: Newbie, I am not sure I will be much help either.. What is expected of you or what you should ... | |
| about Master | 7/31/2008 |
| Q: MY husband want a Master/slave relationship. Would you help me out please by answering some ... A: Connie, Wish I could tell you how to fix this problem.. You can't make him do anything... Problem ... | |
| about Master | 7/31/2008 |
| Q: MY husband want a Master/slave relationship. Would you help me out please by answering some ... A: I am a switch, which means I am both Dom and sub.. I am not at the moment collared in real time.. My ... | |
| about Master | 7/30/2008 |
| Q: MY husband want a Master/slave relationship. Would you help me out please by answering some ... A: Connie, I will try to help by answering any questions you or your husband may have. First off let ... | |
| How to overcome being nervous | 7/22/2008 |
| Q: I am a new sub and I have met a man that I think the world of. I feel we are a perfect match not ... A: cinder, Oh ok, him making you wait could be his way of building the excitement so when you do ... | |
| How to overcome being nervous | 7/22/2008 |
| Q: I am a new sub and I have met a man that I think the world of. I feel we are a perfect match not ... A: Cinder Yes it is very common to feel nervous,, Many go through these feelings.. The more you talk ... | |
| discovering what i am having found my master | 7/11/2008 |
| Q: I have always drifted from relationships that were not right for me. Most would last between a year ... A: Jane, Thanks for writing.. As for your question, no it's not out of the norm for a Master/Dom to ... | |
| What is a Master's responsibility? | 7/8/2008 |
| Q: What is a Master's responsibility towards his slave in regards to medical treatment? i am a collared ... A: lani, I am sorry to hear about your problem. As for what you should do, I would suggest you open ... | |
| New to BDSM as the sub | 7/7/2008 |
| Q: I have never done anything in the BDSM world and my boyfriend who has a 20 year senior to me has ... A: Chelsy, You seem to have already started. You didn't complain on weather or not you enjoyed what ... | |
| Domme Stepsister | 7/3/2008 |
| Q: I have very domme StepSister who was alwasy and still in control of me, She is Daughter of my ... A: Neel, For me to answer this would be wrong.. What I think and what happen to you are two different ... | |
| How to be a better slave to my master | 7/1/2008 |
| Q: PLEASE HELP ME!!! I HAVE BEEN A SLAVE FOR A YEAR NOW.I FIND THAT IM NOT LISTERNING TO MY MASTER ... A: kellie, You need to stop and try to figure out just what has changed that you no longer listen ... | |
| D/S confusion | 6/29/2008 |
| Q: Ok, so my husband is in the military - we've known each other for years, but last year when he was ... A: Mary, This is a hard one, although let me try to explain.. Being submissive can mean doing things ... | |
| abused boy seeking long distance rel w\dom | 6/28/2008 |
| Q: i live on an island,and i am looking for a relationship with a kind gentle femdom. i am a bdsm ... A: rawson, Well I am not sure just what you are looking for but let me suggest a group in which you ... | |
| Domme Stepsister | 6/27/2008 |
| Q: I have very domme StepSister who was alwasy and still in control of me, She is Daughter of my ... A: Neel, Sounds like you need to cut the cord.. Tell her how you feel if you have issues with what she ... | |
| Domme Stepsister | 6/27/2008 |
| Q: I have very domme StepSister who was alwasy and still in control of me, She is Daughter of my ... A: Neel Not really sure what you are asking.. Cleaning and all that can be done without any legal ... | |
| grin | 6/12/2008 |
| Q: At school, everyone knows me as a sweet, innocent, kind, friendly, fun girl. I'm also a virgin. So ... A: Ana, Don't worry about the grin, the boy you were looking at, was simply remembering back to the ... | |
| Punishing a slave | 5/16/2008 |
| Q: I have a friend who believes in female superiority and identifies as a footslave and he feels he ... A: Sara, This is a tricky question, different slaves can take whippings differently. I suggest you ... | |
| developing relationship with wife | 5/13/2008 |
| Q: I've recently introduced my wife to the idea of spanking me to help me behave more to her liking. ... A: Welcome and good luck in your relationship.. Let me suggest a few good books for you and your wife,, ... | |
| newbe | 5/12/2008 |
| Q: after a near death experience my husband decided he wants more out of life. From alt.com he met and ... A: Here you go. i am sending you the entire link which you can find just about anything.. I hope this ... | |
| Advice? | 5/11/2008 |
| Q: Well..Im a little new to being a Dominate and having a Slave. She lives in Oklahoma and I live in ... A: Lymbo, You are correct, slaves test all the time, to see just what it is they can't and can get ... | |
| How a person become interested in BDSM? | 5/1/2008 |
| Q: How a person become interested in BDSM? From Birth? Environment? or Both of them? In my case. I did ... A: Morgan, This is a hard question to answer, there may be many reasons why you are interested in ... | |
| Basics for Learners | 4/30/2008 |
| Q: I have been looking into the D/s lifestyle. Your profile talks about being an expert at different ... A: Greetings Lady Mel, I am so sorry, I am still not doing well, but the list of books you have gotten ... | |
| Basics for Learners | 4/26/2008 |
| Q: I have been looking into the D/s lifestyle. Your profile talks about being an expert at different ... A: Lady Mel, I would love to be able to help you, although I hope that you can give me some time. I ... | |
| alternative to Castle Realm while its down | 4/15/2008 |
| Q: I've always referred vanilla's to Castle Realm as a good introduction to our world. It seems down, ... A: Frank, I am sorry I haven't gotten back to you sooner, but I ended up in the ER and was admitted ... | |
| Asking for release... | 4/7/2008 |
| Q: I have a friend who is not happy in the M/s relationship he is in. He asked me about asking his ... A: Patti, Asking release is not something you need to do in writing, the only time I have seen it ... | |
| My wife is doing painful tortures during our BDSM,Please tell me a solution | 4/3/2008 |
| Q: My age is 25.My wife Suvetha also 25.(I am a software engineer and my wife is a Doctor, We are ... A: Greetings Rammohan, From what I am reading your wife/Mistress is a real sadist, which for some it ... | |
| confusion | 3/25/2008 |
| Q: I am a 24 year old male from England. I am quite a good looking lad and don't really have any ... A: first off let me explain that the feelings you are going through are normal for alot of people. You ... | |
| D/s wedding ceremony | 3/23/2008 |
| Q: We're a D/s couple looking for someone to marry us in a non-traditional setting and ceremony. I see ... A: Domina, You are more then welcome, I will look into Maryland from the contacts I have and see if ... | |
| D/s wedding ceremony | 3/23/2008 |
| Q: We're a D/s couple looking for someone to marry us in a non-traditional setting and ceremony. I see ... A: Domina, We had a small wedding, we wrote our own vows which to most would be considered a 50's ... | |
| castle realm | 3/18/2008 |
| Q: http://www.castlerealm.com/ What gives? nowhere to go on the site....what happened? A: L I have checked the site out, and I can not answer what has happen to it. I do knot it has been ... | |
| My submission to my dominant wife | 3/10/2008 |
| Q: My wife and I started living our D/s lifestyle about 9 months ago when she found information about ... A: I can understand where you are coming from, this happen often in these types of relationships. So ... | |
| Long distance dom relationship | 2/26/2008 |
| Q: ive know the person in question for about a year and a half and over the past months have started a ... A: Ashley, I will answer this with some assumptions. Since it was raised with BDSM in mind, I will ... | |
| femdom | 2/21/2008 |
| Q: i am about to get married i have been living with my partner for 8 years and we have done a few ... A: Greetings john, Good luck with getting married. Now for your question, I would suggest that you ... | |
| long distance internet relationship | 2/18/2008 |
| Q: I'll give you some backstory first. IM in a long distance internet and phone M/s relationship with a ... A: Sounds like your slave is really testing you, maybe she wants more sweet then Master. What ever you ... | |
| bdsm roleplay and long distance | 2/9/2008 |
| Q: ok here it goes i am in a relationship with a master but i'm also a dom myself it's long distance ... A: Tabitha, Let me suggest to you, write him a story, or find one you like that has a scene with rape ... | |
BDSM
Answers by Expert:
Lady Aryana
Top Expert on this page
Expertise
Fem Dom relationships, Male Dom/fem slave, Master/slave relationships M/f, F/f, Long Distance relationships, Leather community, Old Guard, Victorn Lifestyle, BDSM play, Community support, Full time slavery and submission *living together, and how to adjust, protocols, and so forth. Email groups for help with finding others in your area. HOH or DD relationships. I was collared to my Master, then we married Sept 25 2003. I am no longer in a relationship with him, although as D/s has always been a part of me I am still active in looking for a relationship either DD or D/s, or simply learning more in order to help others.
Experience
I have been in long distance relationship that were D/s relationships. I have owned both male and female slaves/submissive, I have been both a real time slave, submissive, and submissive wife. I am not in a committed relationship at the moment although I am in a DD based relationship which has a very strong sense of D/s although it is NON sexual. I am not collared, and I still am always on the look for others to play with around me, and at the moment I have to male slaves who would like to submit. Simply haven't had the time or place to do that yet. I know many egroups who can offer support. I have been active in the BDSM community and a DM for play parties. I have been active for the last 22 yrs in BDSM in one way or another
Organizations
I was active in the GA community when I lived there. I belong to the local BDSM community in AL, Belong to PEP, and other BDSM clubs over the yrs.
Publications
Egroups, Blogs, Journals, And some story writings.
Education/Credentials
Have taken work shops for different BDSM events. Attended SELF given demo's, Been a DM for play parties and private and public clubs. Attending gathering of both D/s, Spanking lifestyles. I have been active in HOH and DD relationships. I was active in the leather community while living in GA. I was trained Victorian and Old Guard. I have trained both Master's and Mistress' along with slaves in the yrs I have been in BDSM.
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