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ok. I am in love with a girl that is separated from her husband. we were dating but are not now. My feelings for this girl is strong and there is nothing that i wont do for her or her children. we stop seeing each other because she is still married. and being the Christians we are we know it is not right. what can i do to let her know how i feel and that i will always love her and her kids. and how do i get the hurt of not being with them go away.
Unfortunately, Shawn when we do things not in line with God's will we end up with pain, stress and a mess. Obedience from the beginning is always better than repentance after disobedience. This was a relationship that never should have started since you both knew she was not free to have a relationship. Hopefully, this will prevent both of you from doing something like this again in the future.
You have already explained to me what you should tell her. She knows it was wrong and while it will hurt, she will understand. The hurt will subside if both of you confess the sin to the Lord and walk in obedience with Him. It will take time and at least you will both be able to counsel and advise those you meet entertaining the idea of entering into a similar relationship. If we learn from our sins and avoid future ones and are a help to others than the healing process is accelerated and God can turn our ashes into beauty.
Father, I do pray for healing of both these people and the children. I also pray for the estranged husband that you would either bring him to Christ or restore him to fellowship and lead him to seek restoration of his marriage that You meant to last a lifetime. Heal souls and spirits showing Your power and glory. Put a hedge of protection around all involved and keep evil from them and keep them from evil. In Jesus' name,AMEN!
Blessings to you as you seek His will and find peace in His Word and in an obedient walk with Him.
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Answers by Expert:
Dr. Ronald E. Shultz
Expertise
I am more of a polemicist than an apologist. I especially desire to answer questions concerning discipleship/holiness, "gray areas", etc. If all you wish is an argument then I am not your man. Sincere seekers only need e-mail me.
Experience
I have ministered in several states since my conversion in 1975. I participate in many forums and have written two books.
Organizations
American Association of Christian Counselors since 2009
Texas Civil Defense since 2008
American Legion since 2002
Honorable Order of Kentucky Colonels, since 1994
Life Member NCOA, 1973
Dover AFB Honor Guard, 1971-73
Publications
Poem, "Cowboy Up" published in an anthology by American Poets Society, 2004
Author, Jail House Religion, Xulon Press, 2004
Author, The Power of Holy Women, Xulon Press, 2003
Messianic Literary Corner published 45 poems, 2003+
Tract “Which Way To God” published on http://www.tracts.com/whichway.html, 1998
Several poems published on various web pages, 1997,1998,1999
Author, Metamorphosis, copyrighted, partially published collection of poetry, 1968-94
Article, “Why I Prefer Expository Preaching”, published in Canyonview Bible Seminary's Expositor, 1988
Education/Credentials
Doctor of Theology, Slidell Baptist Seminary, Slidell, LA, 2001, Summa Cum Laude
Master of Theology, Christian Bible College, Rocky Mount, NC, 2000, Summa Cum Laude
Bachelor of Religious Education , Administration minor, Piedmont Baptist College, Winston-Salem, NC, 1982, Cum Laude
Evangelical Teacher Training Association, Teachers Diploma, Winston-Salem, NC, 1982
Other study: Community College of the Air Force, Maxwell AFB, AL - 1975-78
Upper Iowa University, Fayette, IA - 1976-77
Interim Ministry For Today's Churches - 2000
Awards and Honors
Heritage Registry of Who's Who, 2006-2007
Editor's Choice Award, International Library of Poetry, 2003
America's Registry of Outstanding Professionals 2001-2002
Stratmore Who's Who, 2001-2002
Guest Speaker Texas A&M, Commerce, 1999
Gubernatorial Commendation by Texas Veterans Commission, 1999
Dallas VA Certificate of Pride in Public Service, 1999
Guest on the Kevin Bullard radio program KPBC AM 770,1997
Who's Who in the South and Southwest, 1996
Editor's Choice Award, National Library of Poetry, 1995
Who's Who in Poetry, 1992
United States Army Achievement Medal, 1990
Personal testimony dramatized for international radio program Unshackled, 1986
Outstanding Young Men of the South, 1981
United States Air Force Commendation Medal, 1978
Two USAF suggestion awards, 1976
NCO of the Quarter, 1975
Freedom Foundation Award, 1975
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