Expert: Clive Heath - 8/17/2009

Question
About 3 years ago my husband (who was my boyfriend at the time) started to attend a baptist church with me.  During one of the services he stood up for an alter call and admitted to needing Jesus to save him.  He has been faithful in attending church.  The thing that concerns me is that he never talks about his faith and as far as I know he does not pray.  He does not read the bible but will listen to scripture when I read it to him.  
This past weekend we attended a family reunion with 200 of his family members. They had Mass there as his entire family is Catholic.  He did everything in that service that a Catholic would do but he did not partake of communion because he said he would stay sitting with me.  He did recite everything that Catholics say and he did the Father, Son and Holy Spirit cross sign.  I asked him a few questions during the service, like why are they saying things to Mary when she is not alive and he was downright offended.  He said she is the mother of Jesus and that is a privilege beyond compare. I told him that I pray to God because He is my maker, the giver of life and He is alive and will answer my prayer.  The discussion had to end there or we would have had a huge disagreement.  We have only been married 2 months and this has never been an issue in 3 years !  
I am just wondering what to do and what to say to him?  I can't just ignore this.  Thank you for your time.

Answer
Hi Emily,

Hope you are well and that I can help you with this, but I will say that it is an awkward one!
It could be that he actually never lost his Catholicism, and that he attended your Baptist church because of your beliefs, but as you said he did call out for Jesus to save him.
But as he never talks about his beliefs, I think his Catholisim is his real faith, there is nothing wrong with that but it is as you know completely different to the Baptist way.

We as Baptists look at forgiving and spreading the Word of the Lord, whereas the Catholic way is very unforgiving and hard, and as you say they look to Mary.

I agree that being the mother of Jesus is a privilege indeed, but the God is the creator of all, and came to this world fathered by the Holy Spirit.

As we are Baptists we see our way as the right way, I think you have to talk through this neither of you are right or wrong , but be true to yourselves and your beliefs, as my view is that obviously you cannot be both and if he is Catholic he should not attend a Baptist church unless he intends to follow our ways.

If he is a true Catholic the he should say so and be proud of it, please speak to him, do not let this fester, especially as you are only 2 months into your marriage.

I wish you the best of luck with this, it needs to be dealt with in a very sensitive manner ,but I feel sure the Lord will guide you.

Best Regards and God Bless

Clive Heath