Baptists/Is Celibacy a Sin if chosen?
Dear Pastor Carpenter,
I am in my thirties and have a gay orientation since I was a teen and have never liked women in that way. I have been celibate my entire life by choice because I did not want to become part of something which was so very confusing to me and also not the way God made a man to be.
My question is am I in sin by being celibate and not trying to develop romantic attraction to women and marrying a woman and fathering children as this is what God planned for us all.
I am very comfortable and happy with my celibacy and Paul was celibate and so was Jesus when he walked on earth as both fully God and fully man. There are other men in the bible having lived a celibate life.
God wants us to be fathers and mothers and to fill the earth as he made us male and female.
I could fake it and force myself to marry a woman and father children but then I'd be living a lie but then again God made me a man and I've been wondering if I am in sin in God's eyes for not being a full man.
Thanks and God Bless
Thank you for this fantastic question. I am very sorry for my late response. In Matthew 19, Jesus tells us about how marriage is a life long commitment. The disciples reacted by saying that perhaps it is better not to even marry.... Jesus responded with an interesting couple of sentences:
Matthew 19:10Ė12 (AV)
10 His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry. 11 But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given. 12 For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their motherís womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heavenís sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.
A eunuch is either a castrated male, someone who is impotent, or someone who has chosen to remain celibate. Jesus and the Apostle Paul both refer to the ability to be celibate or without a woman as a gift. One does not have to have a sexual partner to find fulfillment in life. We all have carnal desires that must not be acted upon... it is not the temptation that is sin, it is the fulfillment of that temptation. It is the act of sodomy that makes a sodomite... not the temptation to do so. God makes eunuchs... people with no desire toward women... that is fine... they have a unique role in the Kingdom! It is our perverted society that pressures these eunuchs to believe that since they are not attracted to women, they must be attracted to men... so they should experiment and embrace their sexual orientation. It is this experimentation that creates an addiction to this kind of sin... not a genetic predisposition to homosexuality... it is a genetic predisposition to asexuality that becomes twisted when unbiblical lusts are acted upon.
John 8:34 (AV)
34 Jesus answered them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Whosoever committeth sin is the servant of sin.
So to summarize... you are completely within Biblical boundaries to realize that you are not attracted to women and therefore to remain celibate.... singleness is a gift from God.
I hope that this helps.