Expert: Pastor Don Carpenter - 8/5/2006

Question
When two are in love, and they sign a mutually consented upon prenuptial agreement, are they essence saying to one another that they don't expect to truly build a lasting relationship? Or are they saying "in the event it doesn't work" at least I don't lose out.  

Answer
Hi Karen,

Thanks for this great question.  I have several scriptural principles for you to consider.

1.  For the believer, divorce is not an option unless you have been cheated on, and even then it is not required.

Matthew 19:3-9
3 The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause? 4 And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, 5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? 6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. 7 They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? 8 He saith unto them,  Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say unto you,  Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery. The King James Version, (Cambridge: Cambridge) 1769.

2.  Marriage is a life time commitment.

3.  To make a safety net like a pre-nup, makes it just a little easier to commit sin that is or that leads to divorce.  We are not to do anything that makes it even a little easier to sin.

Romans 13:14
14 But put ye on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make not provision for the flesh, to fulfil the lusts thereof.

The King James Version, (Cambridge: Cambridge) 1769.

In my oppinion, a pre-nup is sending a message to your partner and to others that you are just trying out marriage to see if it will work.... if you do not close the option to divorce, more often than not, when the going gets rough, someone will take it.

I hope that this answers your question.

In Christ
Pastor Don