Expert: Rev C.Brian Ross - 1/22/2009

Question
QUESTION: I was thinking today and it bothered me about my salvation because I am unsure about it.

I said the Sinner's Prayer.

I believe and confessed that Jesus is the Son of the only Living GOD and died for my sins and rose again.

I asked Jesus to forgive me.

I do believe that GOD and Jesus exist.

I did this three times.

I confessed all of it with my mouth.

But I did it because I didn't want to go to hell.

I was also baptized when I was younger.

I never really tried to develop a close relationship with Him though nor have I really wanted to but yet I know that He is trying to have one with me.I'm trying to read my BIBLE and I pray every night but I don't know what you call that.I guess you can call it trying to have a relationship with Him.All of this is tearing me up because I don't know anymore and it would grieve me to the upmost if I have never been saved all of this time.I just don't know if I am really trying to have a relationship with Him.I don't know where I am standing with this.It's not that I do't want one with Him but it's not that I exactly do.I am trying to though.

I used to try and read my Bible and go to church and I do pray to GOD every night.I wish that I had a heart to seek Him more but how do I get that kind of heart?

Am I not saved now?

Oh and in your opinion,do you think that Barack Obama is the antichrist or something?

But every time I find myself wanting to draw closer to GOD.I sometimes feel like I do it still because I don't want to go to hell.As I said,I did what it ays in the BIBLE and when I confessed that I believe that Jesus died for my sins and rose again and still lives,I meant it very much because I do know that is what happened.But I still don't know if I want a further relationship with GOD.I asked Him to give me a heart to want to seek Him more.Does this mean that I am not saved?



Well when I confessed my beliefs,I meant it but I also did not want to go to hell.I truly do know and believe that Jesus died for my sins and that He rose again.I'm 13 by the way.I'm not confessing it just to be doing it.I got saved in 2002,2008,and 2009 but now I still feel like it is still not enough.If I am not saved then what's the point of living?I am desperately trying to do everything to get saved.And I am still not saved?I've did what it says in the BIBLE to be saved!I do believe what I am saying when I say it.I just feel like I don't get saved in order to seek GOD but all I know is that I do believe that Jesus died for my sins and that GOD raised Him back up from the dead.And I know that Jesus is still alive too!But the truth is that I confessed what I said in the sinner's prayer because I truly do believe that Jesus died for my sins and rose again and that He still lives and becaus eI didn't want to go to hell.So what is still wrong?



Someone just told me that if I had to ask if I am Saved then obviously I am not. I go to an Apostolic church but I am really Pentocostal.MY beliefs are that if you accept Jesus Christ as your personal Saviour and ask Him for forgiveness from your sins then you are saved.But of course different denominations have different beliefs on what actually makes you saved so if I went to a non denominational church it might make me confused. So if you don't mind,I will ask my question again.- Well when I was about 8,I asked for God's forgiveness but at the time,I did it because I didn't want to go to hell.I didn't really love GOD because I didn't really know Him that well.So then like 2 years later,I got the Holy Ghost but then I felt that my church was trying to really push me into it so I just all of a sudden shut down.About a year ago or a couple of months ago,I just decided that I didn't want to go to church anymore.I go once in a while but not every Sunday and I feel that if I am just going to make people happy and just to be there then that's a vain reason to go.If you're not there for GOD then there's no point in goingI tried reading my Bible and I started from the first chapter and tried to read the whole book in order.Well that got boring and I didn't understand anything so I stopped that too.So now,the only thing that I will do is pray and majority of the time,it's to ask for things.I'm not really sure if I love GOD because I haven't really got to know Him nor hae I really tried anymore.I know I have really backslided in that area.Does this mean that I am not saved?Or at least anymore now?So now I am not saved?!?!?!?!?!?!?!Now I might as well kill myself.The thing is that I don't know if my heart was into when I was eight,at the time,I Was a little willing to get to know GOD better but now I am hearing this?What are you saying now.Now I am not saved?Yes I do believe that He is the son of GOD and that He died for our sins so that we can be forgiven.I asked Him for forgiveness.At the time,I didn't want to go to hell but at the time,I was young and I wanted to I guess know Him better.But after that,I just drifted off.But now I don't even know if I am saved.Does it sound like I am saved?If I didn't ove GOD when I got saved then does this mean that I am not saved?Do I need to get saved again? I know this is terribly off subject.But now I am in even worse trouble if I am not saved.I feel even worse.They told me that I have to accept Jesus as my master which is what I thought accepting Him as my Saviour meant.It make sme want to commit suicide even more than before.Maybe my life is just going down the drain.I mean,I have everything academically and school-wise going for me.But everything else is just terrible. I live with my mom and she is on welfare and medical cards but yet my dad is rich.I don't live with my dad.But I live with my mom in an apartment building that my dad owns,he owns a lot. I guess you could say that my mom is middle class because we aren't poor.My dad always gives us the money to pay our bills and buy food and all of that stuff. So does this mean that I am poor? There are days when my mom doesn't have money.But we don't starve or don't have clothes but there are some days that there is nothing to eat (which is rare)because I eat up everything and she doesn't have time to go to the store or my dad hasn't given her the money. I am stuggling with my sexuality.I'm not pretty.I have bad thoughts and can not seem to get my mind together.And now I might not be saved?Please respond!







I don't feel good.I'm not alright.This makes me want to do something drastic.Like suicide!I asked Him into my heart but at the time,it was because I didn't want to go to hell or anything.Am I not saved then?Do I need to get saved again or something?







Also I am wondering if I have blaspemed.Sometimes when I say the word gay or something similar,I suddenly look at a picture of Jesus even though I wasn't talking about Him.Sometimes when I say the word gay or something similar,I suddenly look at a picture of Jesus even though I wasn't particulary talking about Him.And sometimes I think things that are blasphemous.I don't mean to think that way.And if I think,I don't say it.But after I do all of this,I ask for forgiveness.But it says that real Christians don't commit blasphemy so that means that I am not a true Christian and that I was never saved.But that means that I have to get saved all over again and I am getting sick of doing it over and over and over!I don't want to blasphemy either because I know what happens to people that do.So what do I do?Am I not saved or a Christian?And sometimes I think about blaspemy.I don't think that I really mean it if I have ever said or else I wouldn't want His forgiveness.I wouldn't even care for that matter.But I do care.I certainly don't curse GOD outloud habitatly.I do have bad thoughts but I ask for forgiveness right after them because I know that I don't mean to even think them,they just pop in my head.If I have ever said anything against GOD or Jesus,I haven't ever meant it,that's for sure.But it just bothers me.So now I might not even be a Christian?"

I also wonder if I have sold my soul.I sometimes think about selling it.And sometimes I say "If I don't do this then my soul is....."



I don't want to say the rest.I don't know if I have bet on my soul but yet I think that I have but I ask for forgiveness after it.I ask God to forgive me for it.But I don't want to sell my soul.Does this mean that I have?"


ANSWER: Dear anonymous (CGLLR) teenager,

What I would love to be able to do is to put my arms around you, give you a great big hug, assure you that God loves you, and then sit down (with some coffee, perhaps!) and talk through your questions/difficulties face-to-face.

That, however, is not possible so I am going to do my best to answer you in this way.  I have asked for your question to be e-mailed to me so that I might take a little more time over it than I might normally take.

You have, in fact, asked a number of questions, and raised a number of issues.  I’ll get the easier, incidental, one out of the way first.  I have a number of questions about the 44th President of the United States of America, but I am not one of those who is ready to immediately claim that he is the antichrist!  That is something that, I believe, only time will tell.

Your personal situation is of much greater concern.  Let’s try to deal, first of all, with the question of your personal salvation, as this is the one that is of the greatest importance.  You mention that someone (you don’t say whether this was a mature believer, or a teenage friend!) told you that if you had to ask about your salvation, then you “obviously” are not.  May I encourage you that one of the basic tricks of the devil is to sow doubt in our minds?  He tried it with the Lord Jesus – see, for example, Matthew 4:3 and 6 and note the words “IF You are …”, so it doesn’t seem strange to me that he would try it with you and me (and yes, after approx 50 years as a follower of Jesus, I can have little doubts arise from time to time).  When I was younger, my big problem was the “unforgiveable sin” (see Matt.12:31-32.).  However, a mature believer pointed out that, if I had committed such a sin, I would not be concerned about it.  If, as you have told me, you have made an honest confession of your sins; accepted that you are unable to do anything about that sinfulness by yourself, but that God, in Christ, has already done all that is necessary on the cross at Calvary; and publicly acknowledged that same Jesus as your Saviour and Lord; then the Bible seems to teach, with absolute clarity, that you have entered into that new relationship with Father God that makes you, not just a part of His creation, but one of His adopted children.  In other words, you have been saved.

Of course, salvation is not an end in itself.  Although it is true that, “God saved you by His grace when you believed, and you can’t take credit for this – it is a gift from God.” and that, “Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it.” (Eph.2:8-9); it is also true that, “he has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things He planned for us long ago.” (Eph.2:10).  In other words, although our works, however good, cannot save us or earn us salvation, once we are saved we have a God-given purpose to fulfil – and I am absolutely certain that suicide (murder of oneself) is not a part of it!

Your domestic situation would appear not to be helping you either – perhaps especially with your self-esteem.  You inform me that you are “not pretty”; but, be assured, beauty really is in the eye of the beholder.  I am a bit more concerned about your references to your sexuality.  May I, without sounding as if I am trying to patronise you, suggest that at thirteen years of age you might consider simply being a young girl, and allowing yourself time to grow up?

I’m not quite certain as to what you mean by your paragraph about blasphemy.  However, I do know that I never use the Lord’s Name, or make any reference to any of the Persona of the Godhead, that is irreverent, and that I squirm when I hear others do so.  If you can relate positively to that, then I doubt that you are guilty of blasphemy.

I hope that I have covered everything in your question but, if there is something that I have missed, please feel free to submit a supplementary question.  You might also find it useful to log on to my ministry blogs (one day, I may learn how to build a proper website!!) at www.crazyrev.blogspot.com and www.revcbross.blogspot.com   You might find some useful information/guidance on one/both.

I pray that you will have a deep sense of assurance of the love of God in your young life, and that He will reveal more and more of His will for you in the coming days, months and years.

In Him

C.Brian Ross (Rev)


---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Well sometimes I question why did I get saved because sometimes I don't know but I am always proud and glad to say that I am.I want to be saved.But why is there something in the back of my head that tells me that I really didn't want Jesus as my saviour?Is that the devil telling me that? I know that Jesus is the only saviour and I was willing to give Him my life too. I also gto saved because I was interested in getting saved.But I didn't want to go to hell eithe rbut I didn't do it to form a relationshipw tih GOD but now I am trying to form one with Him.No one made me get saved either.I decided to but I wonder if I did that because I didn't want to go to hell.Did I get saved for the wrong reasons and am I not saved? I do believe in GOD and Jesus. I also believe that when I pray that GOD listens. I don't know how to have a close relationship with anything and I asked GOD to give me a heart to desire to seek Him and love Him. I want to have a heart to seek Him and love Him. But sometimes I question myself do I only want a relationship with GOD because I don't want to go to hell.Is that a bad reason? What's happening and am I not saved anymore?And sometimes I feel that I don't want to have a relationship with GOD but I asked Him for a heart filled with desire to seek Him more because I desperately want a heart like that.When I got saved,I got saved because I wanted to be saved and because I didn't want to go to hell.I really want to have a heart filled with desire to seek Him,I really do and I don't know if I have it yet.I didn't really get saved in order to have a relationship with Him,let's be honest but now I want a heart that seeks Him.What's happening,so am I not saved?

ANSWER: Hi again!

I was tempted to click the button that says "I have answered this question before", but I don't want to even give the appearance of not caring!  However, I am unsure as to what I can further say that might convince you that much of your apparent difficulty seems to be because you are so young.  Please forgive me if that sounds in any way patronising, as it is not intended to sound like that.

I wish that you could confide in a mature Christian woman - perhaps there is someone in your fellowship with whom you are comfortable - as I don't think that we will get very far by simply going over the same ground again.

I will be praying for you over the next few days, that God will direct you to help that is closer at hand, and that He will either grant you the assurance of your salvation that you seek, or show you that you do need to make a specific commitment, based on love for, and gratitude to, Him.

May you experience much of His Presence, and His guidance, in your young life.

In His service,

C.Brian Ross (Rev)

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Well I was talking to another expert and she told me what the Holy Spirit said.She said that He said that I have not accepted Him so now I am afraid,scared to death.Oh Lord,I am in trouble.I was never saved?!All I did was try!I tried!I asked GOD for a heart filled with desire for Him and I still don't know if I have it.I ask Him over and over again.It hurts to think that all of this time I was never saved.I'm crying right now,that's how much it hurt.I really wanted to be saved.And I did everything it said in the BIBLE,I did!It's not that I don't want Him in my life,I just don't know how to really love Him or have a relationship with Him and to know that He said that scares me TO DEATH.I just don't know how to have a relationship with Him or if I want one right now.I know that I need Him in my life but this makes me think that I am not saved all of this time then I can't get saved in the future.It's scary and it hurts!I did EVERYTHING it said in the BIBLE in order to be saved.I did it all!I don't know what mor eI could do.I really don't.I talk to GOD a lot and still I don't get a reply.I asked Him to show me if I was saved or not but I guess He just did and that's the answer that I wanted to hear.What if I get left behind?!I can't take it anymore,everyday,I wonder about this.Some people tell me that I am saved and others say no that I am not.I am better off dead than go to hell.I just don't know what to do anymore!I really don't.I know time is running out and I have always tried to make sure that my soul goes to the right place.Always.I can't even breathe.I am just now starting to read my BIBLE.I pray every night.I accepted Jesus Christ.I can't do this anymore.I tried to have a relationship with GOD.I don't know how to hunger after Him with my whole heart and soul because I am never sure.Never.So I have to do everything over again and it just hurts,I wanted to be saved.I really did and still do and now I have to do everything over again.I just can't live with this worry.I literally just can't breathe right now.I asked GOD for a heart filled with desire for Him but I don't know if I have it yet.I wanted to be included in God's people and now I am outside of the circle.Maybe He has just given up on me.I don't know what to think or what to do!But why is there something in the back of my head that tells me that I really didn't want Jesus as my saviour?Is that the devil telling me that? I know that Jesus is the only saviour and I was willing to give Him my life too. I also gto saved because I was interested in getting saved.But I didn't want to go to hell eithe rbut I didn't do it to form a relationshipw tih GOD but now I am trying to form one with Him.No one made me get saved either.I decided to but I wonder if I did that because I didn't want to go to hell.Did I get saved for the wrong reasons and am I not saved? I do believe in GOD and Jesus. I also believe that when I pray that GOD listens. I don't know how to have a close relationship with anything and I asked GOD to give me a heart to desire to seek Him and love Him. I want to have a heart to seek Him and love Him. But sometimes I question myself do I only want a relationship with GOD because I don't want to go to hell.Is that a bad reason? What's happening and am I not saved anymore?And sometimes I feel that I don't want to have a relationship with GOD but I asked Him for a heart filled with desire to seek Him more because I desperately want a heart like that.When I got saved,I got saved because I wanted to be saved and because I didn't want to go to hell.I really want to have a heart filled with desire to seek Him,I really do and I don't know if I have it yet.I didn't really get saved in order to have a relationship with Him,let's be honest but now I want a heart that seeks Him.I jstu want a heart to seek Him and want Him in my life.Every single time I said the Sinner's prayer,I meant it with all of my heart.I know that Jesus died for my sins and rose again from the dead and still lives today.That's what it said that I must do to be save din the BIBLE.I'm sorry,I'm jsut having a hard time dealing with this.I can't deny anything if the Holy Spirit gave you that.And that's what hurts even more,because I know that He is telling the truth and if He said that I am not saved,then I am not saved.What must I do to be saved?I tried every single thing there is to do!I just want to be saved and included in GOD's family.I don't want to go to hell and I am trying to have a relationship with GOD.I really am.I will do anything to be saved,I really would.My soul matters more to me than the earth does.I just can't take not being saved.I am seeking GOD because if I wasn't,I wouldn't be asking Him for a seeking heart.I am just so unsure right now.I'm crying because I never expected it.What does this mean?If the Holy Spirit gives you anything else,please tell me.Please respond quickly!

Answer
My poor, dear, child,

All that I am receiving in my own spirit is that you are indeed hurting, but that this is, in a sense, self-inflicted.  

You write that "Every single time I said the Sinner's prayer,I meant it with all of my heart."  Then you have commenced the Christian life, and need to concentrate, now, on growing ever more Christlike. We were discussing this at my home group this evening (UK time) and reminding ourselves that this does not happen overnight.  I have been a disciple of Jesus for some 50 years and I am still a long way off being like Him.  However, I am closer now than I was when I was your age!!

Please do not allow the evil one to take away your peace.  This is his delight, but it causes the Father's heart sorrow as He sees you in such pain.  Do not depend on your feelings, but on the promises in the Word of God.  Keep on praying; keep on reading the Word; keep on asking for His help.  I believe that you will get through.

I really cannot think of anything else that I can say that will convince you - so I am leaving you in the tender and loving care of Father God.  As you keep looking to the Son (Jesus), you will be encouraged by God the Holy Spirit. (go to my blog at www.revcbross.blogspot.com for an audio message on the Trinity - it might help).

As I have already promised, I will be praying for you, little one.  You have become very precious to me, this evening, and I long to hear from you that you are experiencing that peace that passes human understanding.

Richest blessings

C.Brian Ross (Rev)